tdm

[medietas_mods]

Welcome to Medietas! Have an interest in joining the game? Maybe you have an old muse that you want to dust off? Or, maybe you're just looking for a place to voice test a brand new character and would like to do so in our little island setting among friends? Well, whatever the reason, this is where you can do that!

You all know what to do but if you don’t, just follow the instructions and HAVE FUN!

How To Play:

→ Comment with the character you’d like to test drive. Don’t forget to add their name and canon in the subject line.
→ Choose a scenario, or start your own!
→ Tag around!

Possible Scenarios:

1. New Arrival: You've just arrived on the island of Medietas, in the city of Aerilon, via a floating boat with people you may or may not know. Of course, you can't help wondering what the heck is going on, or how you even got on the boat in the first place. But as soon as the vessel docks you are greeted by some lovely locals who offer you a map and a communications device before leaving you to your own. You probably have questions and there seems to be a number of people there already who may or may not have those answers. Talk to them! Or, get on the network and introduce yourself!

2. Getting Settled: So, now that you've arrived and wandered around the starter home you've been given, it's time to check out the rest of the islands. There's a market on Aerilon that is full of treasures. Or, you can check out Chapter Six bookstore. Perhaps you wander over to the Mean Princess facility on Mulciber. There is so much to see!

3. Event: Teams are being put together to venture out deep into the islands of Eurus and Mulciber to track and destroy a vicious beast who has been the reason for the disappearances of several island locals. Please help stop the creature before anyone else goes missing!

4. Wild Card: Got something else in mind and want to create your own scenario? Go for it!

Comments

[withstyle]

The headache that had been slowly starting to nag at Izzy's brain was definitely starting to get worse. Every single thing that Izzy said, Alec had a contradiction for, and it was definitely getting confused in translation; it definitely wasn't easy for Izzy to get it all settled and straight in her head. None of that had happened, not the way that Alec said it. The, normally, younger sibling didn't get what this situation was. The guy standing with her in his townhouse was, absolutely, her brother. He looked like him, acted like him, and everything about his very presence was like the older brother that she was close to. However, the memories that he had, these little details and differences, were just....wrong. "That sounds like the most asinine thing that I've ever heard if she meant it, but it still isn't the way that things happened."

None of it, everything that Alec was talking about didn't match up for Izzy. She couldn't help the frown that crossed her face at his mention of Hodge. "Hodge only did what served him, for as long as it served him." That betrayal and what had happened...well, it was definitely not lining up with what Alec said. What she'd gathered was definitely not that Hodge was actually doing any protecting. It was definitely becoming pretty obvious to Izzy that the order of events and the details weren't going to line up, especially as Alec went on to, attempt, to correct her on what had happened.

"I'm positive that I'd remember if you had been on death's door. That's not the way that I remember it happening." Izzy commented before giving a sigh. How could they...know one another and yet definitely have completely different memories like this? Izzy was caught up in that thought when Alec responded about the wedding. Izzy hadn't really wanted to talk to him much about it. She knew that he couldn't be proud of his mistake in making the decision back home. She'd stuck by him, period, after the way that he'd stayed by her side throughout her trial. However, this Alec...had some differences. He was younger, he was out, and he was obviously more confident than the Alec that Izzy remembered. It was almost strange to see that, actually. Looking up at her brother, Izzy leveled her brother with a look. "Yeah, I know, that's why you couldn't go through with it, but sometimes there's no getting through to you when you decide that you're going to be stubborn and protective."

Izzy did manage a bit of an amused smile, though, thinking about Alec and just how stubborn he could be at times. It felt better to do that than to let the frown pinch at her face any longer than it had to. She didn't need the wrinkles, though, really that was an excuse more than anything else. "It's pretty obvious that we remember everything differently right now.... Either way I'm proud of you for being true to yourself, and doing it in a big way in both instances, but that's really not the point here." Izzy shrugged that off, studying her brother closely for a moment. She didn't feel like they had gotten anywhere.

Different memories, additional scars, and her brother younger than he was supposed to be...Izzy definitely wasn't prepared for any of this.

"I know that scarring like that doesn't go away, by any means, but I'm telling you that you've never had that scar. That didn't happen. So, I don't know.... I don't understand this." Izzy admitted, watching her brother and remaining still while he studied the necklace that probably would have been his if it weren't an obviously feminine piece of jewelry. A small smile pulled at her mouth as she nodded, very lightly. She'd have known if he weren't nephilim. She didn't know how, but she knew that she'd have known, and she wasn't going to question that. "I know the story, but I know that he took it back...it'd be your's if it didn't look so beautiful on me." Izzy teased, needing a little bit of lightness amidst the confusion.

"Ditto, big brother. Minus any notebooks, of course, because I'm not that close with your future boyfriend, yet." Izzy chimed in, giving her brother a small shrug before moving to lean against the counter, once he'd released her necklace, holding onto the edge of the counter. She couldn't explain it right now. She didn't know where to begin, not really. There was enough similar that he wasn't from the inverted world that Clary had gone to. She couldn't help the smile that pulled at her mouth, though. Alec remembered asking Magnus out. Izzy knew for a fact that Magnus had pursued her brother, repeatedly asking him out. It was so strange how some of the things each of them remembered were in direct conflict with one another. "And the way I remember it Magnus asked you out. A lot." Izzy gave a tiny shrug, deciding to go with the amusement from that rather than the confusion.

"I'll look at the book, and if the story is different I'll listen." Izzy agreed, patiently. It was...strange, but she didn't think that he was lying. Alec didn't lie to her. Her brother, also, didn't play jokes...not like this. So, obviously, it was true for him. She was sure that it wasn't something either of them had done, but something else. She just needed to figure out what it was.... "I already believe you, though. It's not lining up, but I don't think that you're lying. And I know I'm not."

Izzy had more to say but her focus shifted as Alec showed her a strange rune on his arm. Reaching out to grasp her brother's arm, Izzy leaned in slightly to study it closer before running the fingertips of her other hand over the symbol. It was....strange. "No, I've never seen a rune like this...ever. Where'd you find this? What is it?" Izzy lifted her eyes up to meet her brothers, curiosity written all over her face.

[angelic_archer]

"Hodge was basically the only parent we had," Alec corrected gently. He knew that Izzy didn't forgive easily. Neither did Jace but Hodge had redeemed himself in some ways. He'd helped Alec and he'd helped Simon as much as he could. "He mentored us and helped us plan missions. If he hadn't called Magnus, I would have died. He did betray us but he also could have left me to die an agonizing death." One that still gave him nightmares. Fighting back a shiver, he shrugged, trying to be nonchalant about it but he still glanced away from her momentarily. "I don't know what mom was thinking. They didn't even bother to come home after I was hurt." They'd come back because of Jace and whatever power games Robert was playing at the time.

Everything about the wedding sounded like it could be out of one of those weird demon dreams. Well maybe his parents' version of them. Izzy wouldn't have dreamed up a fiancee for him that was female. It was too confusing to deal with. Why would marrying this Lydia protect anyone?

"If I'm going to end up with arcane jewelry, it'll be topaz not ruby. Magnus says they're perfect for me." Yes, he really did pay attention when his boyfriend talked about clothes and accessories. Just because he resisted change unless it was a few choice things that Magnus tempted him with didn't mean he didn't listen. Glancing down at her, Alec waited for her reaction to that. Everyone was still getting used to him making jokes and being open about certain topics. "I asked him out. We went on our first date and Jace saw the bite mark my neck. He still won't shut up about it."

There were times when Jace drove him crazy but at least his parabatai had always been supportive. Even when the form of that support made Alec either want to die of embarrassment or kick Jace's ass.

"It sounds like some what's in the book is going to be true and some of it isn't. There's a story in there about you. Maybe that one will convince you..." Hopefully she wouldn't be angry that Magnus had written that particular story down since she had been trying to be sneaky about talking to his boyfriend. If she remembered talking to Magnus...

Smiling at his sister's curiosity, Alec let her do whatever she wanted so that she could get a better look at the rune. "It's called Fearless. It makes you completely unafraid. It's dangerous. Others might be using it now but as far as I know, only Jace and I have tried it." Flushing slightly at the memory, he mentally winced, knowing Izzy would either find the rest of the story horrifying or hilarious. "Clary created it. We were testing it and Robert and Maryse showed up. I kept demanding that they listen to me so I could announce that I was dating someone. Magnus realized what I was going to do and zapped me before I accidentally outed myself."

[withstyle]

It was strange. Even now, knowing that the person that was standing with her in the kitchen was technically younger than her, she felt as if she were getting a lecture from her older brother. Maybe it was just a quality that Alec had sort of patented. Either way, despite the fact that Izzy didn't agree, she didn't pursue an actual argument. Hodge had been there, a lot, when they were growing up. He wasn't their only parent, though. He'd betrayed them and he'd been selfish. He owed Alec more than they owed him, in her opinion....though, maybe not in the version that this Alec was telling. "I'm sure that he did that for you, the way that you remember things, but it definitely went down differently for me." Izzy offered, her tone relatively gentle and controlled.

Seeing her brother look away the way that he did, though, tugged at Izzy's heartstrings. She couldn't help it. She moved so that she could give him a bit of a hug, trying to offer some sense of comfort. They might not be overly affectionate all of the time, but sometimes Izzy just couldn't help herself. Alec was one of the most important people in her life, he always had been. "Well, I was there, right? I mean, you always know that you can count on me." Izzy couldn't imagine that there was any way that she wasn't the same even in his memories and everything that had happened for him.

Izzy didn't linger in the hug, not wanting to make Alec feel self-conscious, but unable to just leave her brother to think about something painful without offering something....even if she didn't remember it. It didn't really matter, to Izzy anyway, that she couldn't remember certain things. They had established that they were the same people when it all boiled down. Now, it was just a matter of figuring out why they remembered differently and if it were a bad thing...plus, going forward from there.

Snorting at Alec repeating Magnus' edict about arcane jewelry, Izzy couldn't help her grin. This was definitely not normal. Not for the Alec she knew, anyway. She'd never seen him repeat anything even vaguely related to style, other than to call things uncomfortable or to make faces at certain fashion choices she'd made in the past. "I can't say I disagree with Magnus. Ruby is definitely perfect for me, not you." Izzy shrugged, still wearing her grin. She didn't understand how things were different, but that didn't make the amusement that came from certain things her brother was telling her that had happened...any less funny to her. "Of course he won't because that's how the two of you are when you're not picking at one another and bickering."

Izzy knew her brothers. In that she'd always been confident. That was why she trusted what she felt even know; she didn't feel like she didn't know the Alec in front of her even if the memories didn't line up. Pausing and giving her brother a look, Izzy waited all of a second for him to elaborate on what story he was talking about. It was hard to be patient when he brought it up like that. "What story is that? I haven't had all that many conversations with Magnus that weren't about you so far." Izzy spoke, both teasingly, and seriously. Even when they'd both been going over the Forsaken Magnus had been focused on the taller and more masculine Lightwood.

The shorter sibling released her brothers arm after studying the rune closely for several long moments, still not able to place it. She didn't even think it looked legitimate in comparison to all of the ones that she'd learned through careful study. So, hearing that Clary created it caused Izzy's face to pinch into a frown. Clary could create runes? "It sounds dangerous and I'd say I'm surprised the two of you have tried it, but I'm not really. What I am surprised about is the fact that Clary did this, she made it, came up with it? I didn't know that she could do that." Izzy putt hat out there, losing track of the serious part of the conversation in favor of letting out another laugh, which was accompanied by a shake of her head at Alec and Jace's antics; they were different according to the Alec in front of her, but very much the same.

This was all so strange.

[angelic_archer]

No matter what Hodge did, Alec couldn't hate him. That probably was strange to Izzy since she became angry so easily, cutting herself off from anyone who slighted her but Alec could forgive their old teacher. Maybe if there had been other adults in their lives, it would be different but since their parents had basically ignored them, it was hard for Alec to hate the only adult who had offered him kindness.

It wasn't a point that he would continue arguing, especially when Izzy hugged him. Looking down as his sister in disbelief as he returned that sign of affection, he realized that maybe this really wasn't his Izzy. She rarely hugged him. Only when they had lost Jace and she'd realized their parents were divorcing did she accept his attempts at comforting her. "You don't hug me. Not like this," he said slowly, trying to understand what that meant. "You don't let anyone in."

Alec ignored the comments about jewelry, struggling with the contradictory information that they had given each other. In the most important ways, Izzy seemed like his sister but in others... How could she have entire sets of memories that didn't match his own? She should know about the Greater Demon and the talk with Magnus. "You visited him on my birthday. You both gave me what I wanted most."

"Someone had to try it. Jace offered, but we decided I was the best choice. Jace later tried to use it when confronting Valentine." When Izzy's attention moved from the Fearless, he showed her his hand where the faint scar of the Alliance rune was still visible. "She and Jace aren't like the rest of us. They have special abilities but Clary is the only one who can create new runes. Jace can't. He's just more... angelic than the rest of us."

[withstyle]

The subject of Hodge was forgotten almost immediately. The second that Alec gave her the look that he did as he hugged her back. Some of the reactions that he had...were strange to Izzy. She didn't understand it, and even as he explained it (she was pretty sure that was why he spoke up, anyway) Izzy blinked twice before she even processed the words. "What do you mean that I don't hug you?" Her tone was a mixture of confusion, offense, and maybe even a bit of trepidation. Izzy didn't go around hugging everyone by any means, but her brother...when it was warranted she was more than comfortable hugging him. "I hug you...relatively often." She muttered, nose wrinkling.

What the hell did that mean? She didn't let anybody in? Alec was the one that wasn't extremely social. She, in comparison, was the social butterfly. Never in her life had the nephilim heard that she didn't let people in. So, she had to question herself, internally, as to whether or not that was true. Did she not let people in? Maybe some of the social ability that she had was for show. She wasn't perfect. She didn't think that she was that bad, though. And that was what she settled on for the moment because the differences that they had discovered already. His Izzy...had to be different, then, which made her feel...strange, truth be told.

Izzy backed up, ever so slightly, her arms crossed...maybe still a little bit in her head. For all of the confidence that she had there were some chinks in the armor of lipstick and perfectly tailored and fashionable clothes. "I think that's another one of these differences." Okay, her tone definitely was somewhat defensive. She almost felt as if Alec might be disappointed in her, or something. She knew that was stupid, but the thought ran across her mind anyway. Truth be told, though, Izzy was happy with who she was. She'd changed as needed, to fit into the roles she needed to step into for Maryse, for whoever, but at the core of it all she was always herself. After all, she'd accepted Clary much faster than her brother had.

The preoccupation was there, so Izzy couldn't help but shrug at the conversation that Alec referenced. She didn't remember it, much like most of the other things that he thought she would remember. It just wasn't the way that things had happened for her. She couldn't help that, and yet there was disappointment anyway. "What did you want most because I don't have that memory, just like all of the others?" She knew him, but she didn't know him, not like she thought she did, anyway.

"I can see why you were the better choice. How did it go when Jace used it then?" Izzy asked, unable to help the curiosity as she leaned forward slightly to study the second, and just as strange, rune that her brother had to show her. It...made sense on some level, but at the time it seemed so big too. Frowning, Izzy leveled her brother with a look. "More angelic than the rest of us...that's descriptive." Izzy stated sarcastically. She didn't know what more angelic meant, though, not really.

[angelic_archer]

"If it's not life or death, you don't hug me. You hugged me when Jace was kidnapped and when we found out our parents were divorcing but you don't randomly hug. You also don't talk about feelings and you were offended by me using soap and shampoo that smelled like sandalwood." The last few details weren't really important but they were common, familiar. "You don't talk about your love life and you treated Simon like you hated him because you were angry over something that wasn't his fault. You use anger and disinterest like they're shields."

No, not this Izzy. His Izzy. All the details led to only one real conclusion. "She uses anger and disinterest like they're shields." But this Izzy didn't. She was open in ways that he'd never seen before in his sister. "She supported me when I thought I didn't have anyone but she rarely hugged me."

After saying that, it probably was strange that he reached out and gently tugged one of her curls like he had tugged on Izzy's braids when he was a kid. "She went to Magnus' apartment and told him that she was okay with us dating. She proved that she accepted me. Magnus enchanted her whip so it wouldn't fail her when she needed it most."

Shaking off the thought, he focused on the runes that Clary had created for them. "The Fearless wore off when he needed it but we won the battle." Smiling as he looked down at the Alliance rune, he knew the description would shock her. "This one binds a Nephilim and Downworlder together. We each share some of the other's abilities." Arching an eyebrow in response to her comment, Alec's expression turned pensive as he thought of his parabatai. "Valentine experiments on Jace. Gave him angel blood. That's one reason why he always excelled in our training."

[withstyle]

Izzy was very quickly discovering that she didn't like the her that her brother, the one standing in front of her at the moment anyway, remembered. What was wrong with her? Izzy was torn between actually wanting the answer and not caring because she didn't approve of what she heard, period, and the idea of making excuses for that behavior wasn't appealing. The weirdest part was that it was her. She didn't remember the things that Alec was talking about, not in the way that he remembered them, but it still seemed to be her. That was unsettling and Izzy didn't like the diea of being that girl.

The idea of being like that...made Izzy think of her mother. She didn't want to be like Maryse...terse, withholding love, and beyond difficult to judge in affections, mood, and in general period. Sure, it sounded like some things were the same, but the thought that she would be so unpredictable on certain thing wasn't a comfort.

"But I do randomly hug...and I talk about feelings." Izzy countered, not missing the mention of divorce, but not surprised either. Her own parents weren't in a great place, but hadn't made any sort of announcement before. Was that where they were headed? Everything that Alec mentioned that hadn't happened...was it just going to happen at a different point for her and the Alec she knew back home, her version of her brother? She had no clue. "I also don't care what soap and shampoo you use, I talk about my love life, your's, and anybody else's that I can because I meddle." Izzy admitted, trying purposefully to keep her tone light, but it was hard. It was hard because she felt like this...brother of her's didn't really know her. And that had to mean that she didn't know him, not in the same way, even though it was close.

She felt like in some ways she was the opposite of his Izzy, and she was.

"It sounds to me like you need more hugs. But at least she and I have in common that we support our brother....brothers...." The comment was tossed out, as if it could have been light, but at the moment Izzy couldn't manage light anything. She didn't like the way she was and the way she came off from this other world. That was hard to just let go. Even if she had good qualities, the bad ones could stack up, given time. She didn't want to end up like her mother. His Izzy....well...who knew? But it was a legitimate worry that she was tugged out of by the pull at her hair.

Even though she probably shouldn't have smiled, Izzy did. That was a memory she had. "You can't pull my pigtails in the middle of a serious conversation, you know." There was no bark behind the comment because Izzy didn't care enough to mean it. It felt nice to have something familiar, something...in common rather than at odds. "Did she need to prove that she accepted you? You didn't know it before?" Izzy spoke the question before she even realized that she didn't know if she'd said the words, or given the brother that she had back home that reassurance yet.

It was a little hard to focus on the runes, despite the fact that the very fact that Clary could create them intrigued her, with everything else being said and the subjects connecting and weaving into one another, but Izzy followed, nodding her head to show that she did. "Why was it created?" She posed the question before her look turned to one of disgust at the idea of Valentine experimenting on Jace. "I've never heard any of that....not even anywhere near close to some of it, even."

It was pretty obvious they came from two different...worlds. How did two worlds that were so different and yet...with some big overarching same spurts, exist? And how, and why, had they been brought here?

[angelic_archer]

How How different for all of them if Izzy had been like the one standing in his kitchen? What would it have been like for him to have casual sisterly teasing and talks when one of their hearts had been broken? His Izzy had been there when he needed her, and he loved her because of who she was, but he wondered what it would have been like if she hadn't closed herself off. He never really knew why it had happened. Maybe Izzy had believed that to be strong she had to distance herself.

What did it say about their family that the reason why he realized that this Izzy wasn't the same as the one he grew up with was the fact that she'd hugged him? "We all did. I tried my best to make sure the three of them were happy, but I was a kid." It wasn't an excuse. Alec had tried and he'd always known he hadn't quite gotten through to his sister but there had been some secret hurting the Lightwoods that he hadn't known until after the divorce was announced.

Even if this wasn't the Izzy from home, he knew every version his sister enough to know she was getting too lost in thought. "We were raised different than you were but the important parts, the parts that make her - you - my sister are the same." Letting her dark hair curl wrap around his fingers, he gave her a smile meant to annoy her. "Yes, I can. I'm your big brother. It doesn't matter if you're not the Izzy I grew up with. Alecs will always be big brothers to Izzys." It would be strange to get used to the differences but Alec knew that he'd still love her.

"Valentine sent an army of demons into Idris. He meant to wipe out every Shadowhunter except Clary." And his son, but Alec couldn't call Sebastian a Shadowhunter after everything he'd done. His forgiveness could only go so far. Maybe when enough time had passed he could let go of the past. "The Downworlders agreed to fight with us and she created a rune so that we could fight as equals. It's safe for a Downworlder to wear the other half. I fought with Magnus." Despite the seriousness of the situation, he grinned, eyes bright with the memory. "I could feel his magic, Iz. I think I might have been able to cast a spell if Magnus had shown me how."

Yes, Alec did geek over magic even if most Shadowhunters thought of it as distasteful. He wondered if the other Alec was as interested in Magnus' magic. He hoped so. Magnus had been so pleased that Alec loved his magic and warlock marks instead of being afraid of them.

"Valentine gave Jace's mother and Jocelyn angel's blood while they were pregnant. Only a few people knew the truth. Jace and Clary didn't find out until a few months ago." He still wasn't sure how Jace felt about it. He'd teased his parabatai about being more angelic than him and told him it didn't change anything between them but Jace had still been coming to terms with everything before Alec had been brought to the islands. "I told him that the differences don't matter and they don't with you either. We'll figure this out, sis. Your Alec is different than me but that doesn't mean that I can't be like your brother in the ways that matter."

If Izzy wanted him to be in that role. She could say no and walk away, never talking to him again. "Unless you don't want to see me again. I'll leave you alone if that's what you want."

[withstyle]

"If you're anything like the Alec I know, even as a kid you took yourself too seriously while trying to make the others happy." Izzy commented, wondering if it were actually true. She had to assume. He seemed very similar with just small, nuanced things that she wouldn't notice if it weren't for the glaring differences she'd been seeing since she'd met up with him. "And you took too much responsibility for your siblings on top of that." Alec had always taken the weight of the world on his shoulders, particularly of their world.

It was so strange...to feel like she knew someone and yet to know that she didn't have all of the shared memories that should have been there. This other...version of her brother was definitely difficult to wrap her head around. And Izzy wasn't doing it all that well at the moment, she knew that; she wasn't quite as adaptable as she'd always felt she was.

"You do seem....really similar to my Alec. I can't see that many major differences other than the way things happened for you, plus the additional confidence that my brother could use." Izzy commented, a bit of a smile pulling at her face; it only grew as she made a realization in relation to the words that were pouring out of his mouth. It was sweet, but there were some facts that he was flipping around because they weren't what he was used to. "Actually, I'm older than you now, technically speaking, so not always." Izzy spoke, finding the amusement in her correction, despite the disappointment that she'd been fighting before. In retaliation for the gentle tugs on her hair, Izzy gave her brother (even if he wasn't exactly right) a gentle jab with her finger in his side. He wasn't the one that she had grown up with, but he was as good as, even if the knowledge that...his Izzy had treated him differently made her angry with herself...her other self.

She didn't like that version of herself, and even if she didn't say it to Alec, she couldn't help but think it; that was a person that she worked hard not to be because it honestly made her think of the mother whose affection she could never manage to earn.

Zoning back in on her conversation, rather than her mommy issues, Izzy couldn't help but let out a whistle of approval and to show that she was impressed. She wasn't sure that the Clave she knew would ever approve of a move like that. Izzy could understand how the move would be a smart one, but she didn't know that the people in charge, that she knew, would ever go for that. They all had their prejudices, but if it served it's purpose, she supposed they might be convinced to do something smart. "Let me guess, it was quite magical for you?" Izzy teased, thinking aback to the words he'd used in front of Lydia, shaking it off for a moment. "It sounds smart, but I have no idea how you managed to make it happen. Color me impressed. And amused at you fanboying." Izzy tacked on the last bit, unable to help herself.

She didn't know what she made of Valentine, but everything that Alec had to say about him only made the man worse in her mind. "Hell of a secret to keep all that time...Poor Jace and Clary." Izzy offered the thought, thinking about the fact that it would be hard to come to so many realizations about the person that was biologically connected to them. And to know the varioust hings that he'd done to them, in that...world, anyway. God, Izzy hoped that wasn't the case back home.

Izzy had already made her mind up, whether or not she conveyed that or not. She accepted this Alec, even if she didn't quite accept the alternate version of herself. So, as Alec made a point to do the big brother thing, she couldn't help but lift her eyebrows, giving him her full attention and letting him finish everything that he had to say before she gave any response. "You're not getting rid of me that easy. I've already decided I'm keeping you, you're not so different that I'd push you out. If you were weird or something it might be another story." She joked before continuing, the confident cockiness that she generally wore dripping all over her voice. "You deserve the better, no offense but we both know I can't help myself, Izzy in your life and that's me." She smiled to take some of the sting out of her words, even if she actually meant what she was saying.

[angelic_archer]

"It wasn't just to keep everyone happy," he corrected gently. "Someone had to keep the two of you alive. Robert and Maryse were rarely there. I know it changed how all of you saw me, but I couldn't let you two get hurt." Even if that meant he wasn't the popular one or that his siblings didn't love him the way he'd hoped for. "I'm never going to make my parents happy. I accepted that after I introduced them to Magnus." Not quite but if Alec told himself that enough, he began to temporarily believe it. "You would have done the same if you'd been the eldest. You would have protected us."

So would his Izzy but thankfully she'd never had to deal with that. She had been free to be the person she wanted to be. And, now, Alec had that freedom too. It had been worth the wait even if there had been times when he'd never thought he'd have a chance at happiness or acceptance.

"The confidence was partially because of her. She shoved me in the right direction. I did need that acceptance that she gave me. That and Clary forcing me to confront my feelings changed everything." He was still changing, but that was for the better. It was time for him to step out of the shadows. To prove that he was silver, as Magnus had phrased it. Someone worthwhile even if the Clave didn't believe that.

"I'm still taller so I'm the big brother," he said with a grin, letting go of her hair while exaggerating a wince over the poke to his ribs. "The two of you are more similar than you think."

The comment about the rune being 'quite magical' sounded like it was some sort of joke that the other Alec would know. "What did he do for you to tease him about that?" It was probably something that would embarrass the other version of himself but it couldn't be worse than some of the things he'd done during his early dates with Magnus. Or his flailing over the hickey on his neck and trying to explain that he fell and ended up with a bite mark near his block rune. "Clary did it. And Luke and Simon. They were the ones that finally helped unite everyone. As much as possible. We're still working out the problems."

Before he could hide the reaction, his smile faltered and he forced himself to push aside the familiar sorrow. "There were worse secrets, Izzy, but it's not something to discuss today. It's too hard." Eventually Alec would tell her about their little brother. When there hadn't been so many shocks and confusion. "They'll be okay eventually. Jace needs to accept that it's okay to love someone who did terrible things but he's working through it. He isn't even trashing werewolf bars anymore."

It wasn't quite a joke but at least when Jace was feeling self-destructive, he knew to take Alec with him.

Waiting for her decision, he looked at her solemnly, knowing she would probably poke him again. "I hate to break this too you, but I am weird. I check out Silent Brothers and I sing random songs I hear on the subway." Her Alec probably wouldn't admit any of that, if he did those things. "But I had to give you a chance to be on your own. It wouldn't be fair to assume that you wanted another brother. We both know I can't say one Izzy is better than another. But someday I'll tell you why I think she acts that way toward everyone. You can tell me how you ended up different and I'll hope that my Izzy can find a way to be happy."

[withstyle]

Izzy couldn't decide if it was just the things that she was hearing, or just how her view was colored at the moment, but to her it seemed as if the Alec that she was with at the moment...his life had been harder than the one her own had. Then again, maybe she was just ignorant to her own brothers issues. She really hoped that wasn't the case. She accepted her brother, period, and liked to think that she was one of the people that understood him best, and that could connect with him no matter what was going on with him. "I'm sure it didn't change how anybody saw you. You put others before you put yourself, and even though you deserve better it isn't a bad thing." Izzy offered back, just as gently, knowing that her own brother, the one she grew up, was the most important person in her life.

The thought that Robert and Maryse wouldn't accept him...well, it pissed her off, her protective urge rising, even if there was nothing she could do. "I don't know what I'd do if I were in your shoes, I've never really been in that situation, but I do know that anybody who can't love and accept you for who you are doesn't deserve your time." It was so much easier to say that for him, as opposed to accepting that for herself. Izzy gave a delicate shrug, wondering if she'd have been as strong. She had some doubts. As a younger sister she did everything she could for her brother, but he'd definitely gone above and beyond. And it sounded like in both versions, worlds, whatever.

"Izzy and Clary tag-teaming helped you find confidence. If I'd known that was the trick..." Izzy trailed off, keeping things light. If she knew exactly how to help her brother she'd have done it, that was for sure. It was nice to see this Alec with confidence and in a better spot; she was pretty sure her Alec was beginning to get there after the wedding, but she wasn't lying to herself in thinking that it'd just come easy; he'd repressed who he was far too long for that.

"Physically, anyway. Guess that means I get to be wiser." Izzy joked, not sure that she actually was, but putting it out there anyway. She didn't want to be similar to the Izzy that he knew, not from what he'd said about her, but she wasn't going to make that comment. She didn't want to be a complete bitch. "I'll have to take your word on that. I haven't met her."

It was funny Maryse had always been Izzy's harshest critic, but now....maybe she was her own in this particular case. And she couldn't heven help it. Or feel particularly bad.

"Oh, tripped over himself verbally when Magnus was brought up in conversation." Izzy grinned, eyebrows lifted in amusement. "We were bringing Magnus in to help us and he had a little bit of a moment when he was asked if he knew Magnus. That was the way he described him: quite magical. It was funner in the moment, the way he waws spazzing over Magnus and couldn't quite figure out what was safe to say." Izzy shrugged in summation. She couldn't say that she was surprised at the idea of her friend bringing them and the downworlders together; she'd already shown, some, that she could manage it with the vampires and werewolves. Luke and Simon definitely had helped, so maybe there was more to come. Izzy nodded. "Sounds like a fair start, though."

The change in Alec definitely gave Izzy pause, her eyebrows scrunching and wrinkling her forehead. "That does not sound comforting, you do realize that, right?" Worry edged it's way into her voice as she wondered what exactly was too hard for him to touch right now? They'd covered a ton of topics already and some of them definitely hadn't been easy. The fact that there was something bigger than everything they'd gone over already...definitely a little scary.

"Jace has always been someone that works through things in his own time, I guess. Did he really trash werewolf bars or are you exaggerating?" Izzy posed the question curiously. She could imagine it, but her Jace hadn't done it, that was for sure. That she'd definitely remember. That melted into an eye roll very quickly. "Not weird enough, apparently. Though, now, if I ever get home I'm going to watch the other you for those things, for the record." Izzy pointed out, wondering already if he did those things even as she moved onward in their conversation. "I'm a social butterfly, I never prefer to be alone. You'll learn that about me quickly enough, I'm sure. And I, apparently, collect brothers." Izzy shrugged, as if that was that.

Because it was.

She had some guesses as to the other Izzy's reasoning. It didn't mean she had to like it. "I have some guesses, but I'd be happy to tell you what I can." Happy wasn't dead-on accurate, but Izzy had never been unhappy either. She wasn't too far from it, though; she was relatively content, even if life wasn't perfect. Maybe one day, though, for now she was here, though, and she was going to embrace this new and very strange life and situation she was in because Izzy did want to be happy, and maybe while she was here she would be.

[angelic_archer]

"It did, Izzy." There was no hurt in his tone, only the acceptance that he'd been working on since he'd come to terms with his life. "You and Max adored Jace. He was the amazing brother. The two of you wanted to be like him. He was the one who was special. Not because of the angel blood, but because of who Jace is." It'd hurt, especially with Max, but at least his little brother had had someone to look up to. Someone's memory who had helped him be brave during the worst moments. "I know that Maryse and Robert preferred the three of you." Knowing he'd sound angry and bitter, he stopped before he mentioned the parts of his life that had hurt the worst. The night Magnus had healed him and the realization that his parents would never accept the person he loved.

"I know what you'd do. You would protect us while always looking perfect. I'm learning to quit wishing they'd accept me. It take time and Robert did apologize. I just haven't decided if I can forgive him." Magnus told him that time would ease the wound but Alec's time was finite. His life might not be long enough for him to move toward that maturity. "Telling me once that I was a good man doesn't make up for years of treating me like I was less."

Rolling his eyes, he considered the other version of himself. "If he was like I was pre-Magnus, he would have panicked and ran away. It took Clary forcing me to see who I loved most to realize it was Magnus." Eventually, he would have told his parents. He'd promised Magnus that but that rune had been the motivator he'd needed. "I owe her a lot. If she hadn't done that... Everyone says that I made it okay to be gay but if she hadn't given me that shove, I don't know if I would have came out like that."

It still unnerved him at times. The younger Shadowhunters stared at him like he was as colorful as Magnus or the way Mundanes stared at movie stars. He'd changed things for them, proved to them that it was okay to be out of the closet, but that didn't mean that he was used to the attention.

"Better to trip over his words than the stairs," he deadpanned, waiting to see if Izzy realized that he was being truthful. "At least he could talk about Magnus. I sulked and didn't speak to anyone except to comfort you over Simon. I freaked any time anyone mentioned him." Rubbing the back of his neck, he gave her a sheepish look. "I probably would have described him like that before trying to find the quickest way out of the room." Lydia again. Who had she been in their lives that Izzy's Alec would plan to marry her? Maybe her Alec had thought he loved her. That was a kinder thought that some he had about the wedding after what Izzy had said about needing to protect someone.

"I know it's not but it's not an easy topic. It'll hurt and -" Letting out a sigh, he tried to think of a way to reassure her. "The wars were bad. Truly terrible things happened. We learned the Valentine wasn't the worst evil out there among the Shadowhunters. I promise to tell you. If you want, I'll tell you today but not standing in the middle of the kitchen." Their brother deserved better than that. So did Izzy once she knew the details of that battle.

"The problem with Jace working things out in his own time is that violence is how he works them out," Alec grumbled, finally remembering the coffee and breakfast that he'd been planning as he'd left Red Rum. "He really did trash a werewolf bar. He probably would've have died if Luke hadn't told the wolves to stop. I should've known he'd do something stupid but Maryse was too busy yelling at me for me to go after him." He still should have went. He should have known what his parabatai would do.

Moving to the cupboard, he pulled out the coffee, shrugging as he grabbed what he needed. "I don't sleep much. I work two jobs so I don't have to think about home," he offered as an apology. "You'll think I'm weird when I start singing that song. And if you see Brother Zachariah, you'll understand why I couldn't stop staring."

That had to be a difference between her Alec and himself. If he was that repressed, he probably never would admit that he had checked out anyone, let alone talk about guys with his little sister. "I know it'll probably be weird to talk about another version of you but I just hope that she can be happy. She needs to let go of what our parents did." Measuring out coffee, he studied her thoughtfully. "Maybe she'll be more like you when she's older." Hitting the start button, he arched an eyebrow, knowing that he was probably going to provoke a 'fight'. "I'm going to assume I shouldn't let you near the stove."

[withstyle]

Izzy couldn't help her frown. This Alec, this version of him, didn't understand exactly how important and how great he was. The alternate version of her really hadn't appreciated him the way she probably should have; the others...probably could get a free pass, but Izzy had always had a good relationship with her own brother, so to see any version of Alec not realize that he was an amazing brother, which she was sure he was, was just sad. "I don't think you should measure anything based on how our parents feel about anything." Izzy commented with a none too subtle roll of her eyes in regards to said parents. "If you're anything like the Alec I know, though, you're an amazing brother. And I adore him, and by proxy you." Izzy admitted, not minding that it wasn't something this other version of Izzy, the one he knew, would say.

"And if it's any consolation, back home for me Maryse never prefers me. She prefers you and Jace even though she's angry about the wedding." Izzy waved her own statement off. It really wasn't important in the scheme of things. She managed to sound flippant despite the fact that she definitely had some underlying mommy issues. A grin pulled at her face, though, at Alec's decision on how she would handle things were they different. "Well, I'm sure that the looking perfect part is probably right."

Izzy grinned, confidence all over her face.

She couldn't really be surprised at the idea of their father apologizing. She shrugged, though, not weighing in one way or another. It was up to Alec as to whether or not he chose to forgive; the man wasn't perfect, that much even she was aware of...even if her relationship with him was better than the one that she had with her mother. "I don't think you have to make your decision now, but I know you'll decide what's best for you." There was an unspoken support there, written in Izzy's bright, red smile.

Izzy chose not to make a comment on her own version of Alec. He'd seen Jace when the memory demon had taken a memory of the person that each of them cared the most about. It had obviously been had for her brother, and it felt wrong to actually bring it up in the moment. Instead Izzy nodded; Clary had come along and offered a lot of help, support, and a new perspective for all of them. Izzy was glad for the other girl's friendship, personally, even if it had taken Alec some hemming and hawing to actually grow used to her.

Izzy didn't manage to control the laughter that erupted at the idea of her brother falling down the stairs; she couldn't help herself. "Did you fall down the stairs, seriously?" Izzy asked, unable to help herself; she hadn't seen her brother do anything like that in some time. Her curls bounced lightly as she shook her head. "The other version of you sulked too, and didn't want to talk to me. He's just not good at hiding things from me. Why were you comforting other me about Simon, though?" Izzy couldn't help the questions, even though she knew she probably should stop considering things were definitely different between their two worlds. There were definitely similarities that she couldn't ignore. Her own Alec freaked in his own ways. She wondered if that was what was going on with the topic he wasn't ready to touch too.

It seemed serious, though.

"As long as you promise that eventually you'll tell me we can wait until you're ready and you think the time is right." Izzy spoke, delicately, figuring that they'd hashed out quite a few things already. Did they really need to add something else onto it right now? Probably not. No matter how impatient Izzy was by nature. "I can be patient...sometimes, anyway." Izzy admitted with a shrug, still wondering exactly what it was.

Watching her brother get back to the coffee as he spoke, Izzy settled back against the counter, keeping out of his way and letting him get back to what he'd started to do before they'd devolved into the Lightwood Family Soap Opera. A little snort escaped at what he shared about their brother, and about Maryse. "Guess he was lucky that Luke had his back in that case. What were you being yelled at for....god I keep asking questions and it's got to be getting old." Izzy complained, lightly, noting where he kept the items that he was pulling things from. She definitely blinked, though, as Alec admitted that he wasn't taking care of himself.

Okay, maybe that wasn't the way that he meant it, but that was the way that Izzy read it, as opposed to an apology.

"Well, you need to work on that asap." Izzy bossed, not hesitating at all. "You need to get enough sleep." Yeah, it was a motherly thing to say, but she couldn't help herself; sometimes she had her moments, and she wasn't ashamed to admit it, at least to herself. Pointing at her brother from her perch, the formerly younger sibling couldn't help the look she leveled him with. "You don't want to run yourself into the ground....as for how weird you are... I'm kind of used to it and I'm already enjoying this whole you talking about staring at guys thing." Izzy grinned, that sort of meant to soften her chastising him for the habits he'd fallen into. She really hoped that eventually her brother could get to this point, but he definitely wasn't there yet...even if he was the older version.

Maybe the other her would get there. However, she'd never been like that. Never, and she was definitely proud of that fat. Izzy shrugged. "This whole thing is weird, so...I'm sure I'll be fine. And maybe she'll turn into me, you'll know when and if you get back there." Izzy smiled at her brother....only for that to drop immediately at the question that he posed.

Izzy's eyes narrowed and she pointed at her brother for the second time in a matter of minutes. "That is a completely unwarranted assumption and I'm offended that you would insult my cooking before even tasting one of my amazing dishes! I'm a good cook!"

[angelic_archer]

Ducking his head, he wasn’t sure what to think about Izzy’s automatic assumption that she’d adore him. It was different for him. How could he not care about her no matter what reality she was from but Alec knew he wasn’t the easiest person to be around. He was getting better, growing past the boundaries he’d thought were necessary but she’d just met him. His siblings loved him but he’d been the boring eldest brother. He’d hoped that after he moved out that things would change for the better and in many ways they had. They all were changing for the better but it was still strange that Izzy would adore him simply for being Alec when for years it seemed like he had to be someone else. “I’m learning not to. But you should be careful about assuming you’ll adore me. I am weird, remember.”

“Izzy and Maryse have a strange relationship. I don’t understand it,” he explained, trying to be as honest as possible since this Izzy should know something about the teenager that Alec knew. “Jocelyn says Izzy’s like Maryse was when she was a girl but –“ His parents had been part of the Circle and Izzy would never be part of those kinds of atrocities. They were all guilty of Shadowhunter elitism but they’d never hurt someone because they were a Downworlder. “In some ways they are similar though. They keep their distance emotionally. But Izzy’s never wanted power the way our parents did.” Grabbing a pair of coffee mugs, Alec looked over his shoulder, rolling his eyes. “Is he getting the ‘it’s a shame no one will inherit your eyes’ or ‘it’s a pity you won’t give your parents grandchildren’ speeches yet?”

Setting down a mug on the counter, he studied Izzy for a moment, considering his own parental problems. “Our parents don’t define us and if they can’t appreciate us, then they don’t deserve us. We became good people because of our bonds with each other. After the things they did in the past, they have no right to judge us. From what you’ve told me, you supported and loved your brother when he was sure the rest of the world would hate him and that he didn’t deserve to be Nephilim. You accept and love him and that makes you better than your Maryse will ever be.” Giving her a self-conscious smile, he tapped his fingers against the shiny ceramic. “You probably don’t know how important that was.”

Considering the comments about his father, Alec decided to push them aside. They had more important things, pleasanter things, to talk about than Robert and his homophobia and how he’d treated his parabatai. Eventually, they’d get to that subject. Would this version of Izzy be as horrified as is had been? She’d been furious with Robert and Alec had the feeling that why she’d cut most ties with their father was because of that confession. Even without having a parabatai, she knew what Robert had done was wrong. She’d seen Alec’s own fears over Jace’s reaction his sexuality enough to know how horrible it had been for Michael. Thank the Angel that Jace hadn’t freaked or hated him when he realized that his parabatai was gay.

“Even before I started dating Magnus and had to learn about fashion, I knew you looked perfect,” he confessed solemnly, eyes bright with the humor he tried, and failed, to hide. Laughing at himself, he nodded at her question. “Yes, I did, but Magnus had been very – “ He cleared his throat, flushing faintly. “Distracting. I think I’m more forward than your Alec.” Rolling around on the floor, tearing each others’ clothes off, forward but there were some things his not quite little sister shouldn’t know about. “We met Magnus at a party and Simon didn’t know about Downworlder parties. He drank something he shouldn’t have and got turned into a rat. We couldn’t find him and she was crying because she hadn’t taken better care of him.”

Maybe that’s when he should have known that something would happen between his sister and Simon. Usually she would have felt guilty over getting a Mundane in trouble but not to that extent. Alec had assumed that alcohol or whatever else was in the drinks had caused Izzy’s heartbreak but maybe something else had been there too. “I don’t mind the questions but I expect you to tell me about your world too. Like why Alec thought it’d be a great idea to get married if he knew he was gay.” How would that have even worked? Someday that would fall apart in some spectacular way that would destroy more lives than it would have helped.

“Luke couldn’t let Clary’s brother get hurt. Well, at that time he was her brother.” That was another strange, convoluted subject that he wasn’t sure had happened in Izzy’s world. Hopefully, it hadn’t since it’d nearly destroyed his parabatai. Maybe Valentine hadn’t played that particular mind game in Izzy’s reality. “He still wouldn’t have let the wolves hurt a Shadowhunter if he could stop it but Jace was a special case.”

Pouring coffee, he kept his expression neutral as he considered the lecture Maryse had given him while he’d hoped that she’d say something about being grateful that he was alive. “She told me off for not taking better care of you two when Abbadon attacked us. I don’t really remember what she said.” He’d been trying too hard not to show any signs of his injuries, to be the adult she expected when he had been hoping for some sign that he was important to her. Mostly he remembered the hurt and how it’d reinforced that he wasn’t special to his parents. Not like Izzy, Jace, and Max. “I don’t know what she was expecting. We were a bunch of teenagers facing a Greater Demon.”

It shouldn’t have happened and his parents should have cared that their son was dying but they’d never really shown any interest in them until Max was gone.

Blinking at Izzy, he tried to figure out what she would want to work on, belatedly realizing that she meant his work schedule. “Izzy, it’s no worse than what we were doing when we were fighting Valentine. Except there’s less fighting. I watch vampires flirt with their snacks at night and I’ve been training to be a first responder during the day. I just hated being alone in the house and even that’s gotten better.” Thanks to his agreement with Sebastian that they could crash at each other’s townhouse when their own place became too quiet.

It probably wasn’t a good idea to mention staring at guys and then think of his neighbor. Glancing down at his mug, he told himself that he was allowed to look. Magnus thought it was amusing when Alec finally relaxed enough to be able to enjoy checking guys out. It was normal after so much time repressing an important part of himself. “There are some hot guys here. I’m sure you’ll have most of them charmed and falling in love with you… unless you’re serious with Simon in your reality.”

Rolling his eyes at her complaint about her cooking, he covered his laugh with a cough. “My Izzy should never be allowed in the kitchen. She has very ‘unique’ ideas about flavor combinations and borrows recipes from the Fae. There’s this weird soup with peanuts that –“ He almost shuddered at the thought of it. It was a miracle that none of them had gotten food poisoning. “I don’t know if it was really meant for Nephilim.” That had to be more polite than saying Izzy nearly killed them with her cooking on a regular basis.

He began considering breakfast, a normal task that he’d performed for years for his siblings because there really hadn’t been anyone else to feed them before realizing he couldn’t keep avoiding talking about the youngest Lightwood. It wasn’t fair to her or to Max. By the Angel, he didn’t want to tell her, especially when her Max might be safe. Her Max might escape his Max’s fate. But avoiding difficult topics never solved anything. It’d been what had caused some of the worst problems in their lives. Gesturing toward the kitchen table, he sighed as he scrubbed a hand through his hair. “Izzy, I think I need to tell you about that subject I wanted to avoid. But we need to sit down first.”

[withstyle]

Izzy studied the alternate version of her brother for merely a moment before she chose to respond to his warning; she didn’t hesitate and she didn’t think about what was coming out of her mouth before it did, she didn’t have to. “Good, and I don’t need to be careful. I don’t care if you’re weird.” It was such a simple statement from the petite woman, but she shrugged, truly meaning what she’d just said and her tone, her entire demeanor not leaving any doubt in that fact either. She truly didn’t care if he thought he was weird. That wasn’t what mattered to Izzy. She loved her own brother no matter what, and the Alec in front of her might not be exactly, to a tee, the one that she knew, but he was still the same person. He was just an Alec who had different choices, different events to shape him into the person that he was, and none of that changed him so drastically that Izzy couldn’t attach herself to him either.

She missed her own brother, and he was legitimately the next best thing because he was her brother….just….different

“Sounds a little like my relationship with Maryse.” Izzy shrugged, unable to help the frown that marred her face. She’d been told how similar she was to her mother, and she’d then decided that she needed to be serious, in an attempt to keep Alec from shouldering all of the weight their parents wanted to heap on them to make up for the sins of their past. “She told me that I was like her when she was younger to make it clear exactly how much she disapproved of my choices, all of them.” Izzy’s shrug was a forced nonchalant movement that was anything but. “I try not to be like her, though, especially when it comes to being emotionally stunted and distant.” Izzy’s tone was harder than it had been prior to this, but she forged forward, knowing that her mommy issues weren’t something to dwell on; it was strange, though, that the other her had let herself be similar to the woman that had never liked her…though, he had said it was different for other Izzy.

“Not yet, but I’m sure it’s only a matter of time. Right now they still haven’t gotten over the show that Alec gave all of the people who came to attend the wedding. She hasn’t had enough time to come around to trying to guilt and shame him yet.” Izzy spoke honestly; at least, to her knowledge Alec hadn’t gotten those particular speeches yet, and she could only assume that when he did he would tell her. She was close with her brother, no matter how much he pretended that she drove him nuts, and she wasn’t going to treat this Alec differently. She might be older, but that didn’t mean that she was any less herself, or any more willing to be here alone and without one of her most treasured people even if he were from an alternate universe…or whatever.

A smile pulled at Izzy’s face, unable to help herself. It was like Alec was sort of reading her thoughts. Alec had always been intuitive at times, even if he’d never actually admit it. “You might need to repeat that a bit more for it to actually sink in, but you’re right.” Izzy reached up, pushing her hair back and out of the way as she looked down, a bit of a sheepish quality to her face…or at least as close to sheepish as Isabelle Lightwood got, anyway. “He’s done the same for me, supported and loved me, no matter what even when I didn’t want him to. We protect one another.” Izzy, purposefully, left that we open to include him, not just the Alec that she knew.

Izzy was nothing if not decisive and confident; she made decisions and stuck with them, period.

The fashionable Lightwood let out a laugh at her brother. She couldn’t quite imagine the walking tree that was her brother taking a tumble, but she sure as hell did try. And what she was imagining was more than sufficient enough. “You’re definitely more forward than my Alec. He’s still afraid, but he’s getting there” Izzy shrugged, unable to help herself; she knew that Alec was going to get there, it was just taking him time to get where he wanted, no needed, to be. Blinking, Izzy couldn’t help but feel confusion at what had happened to Simon. “Yeah, that’s never happened on my end. I have failed at looking after him too, though.” Izzy admitted, conceding to that fact. It had been her fault that Simon had been taken by the vampires initially. Izzy tried not to dwell on it, considering what had happened to him, ultimately, but that was easier said than done at times.

Shaking that off, Izzy grinned at her brother. “Oh, don’t worry. I will. And you can ask questions whenever you want.” She reassured and then made a face at the first thing that he threw out. Of course he had to start there. “They were going to make him marry. The unsanctioned missions that we’d gone on, according to her, had shamed the Lightwood name.” Izzy rolled her eyes, the they and her feelings on the whole thing, obvious. “My Alec took it into his own hands. He picked Lydia because she was running the institute after the Clave had a hissy fit and handed it over to her. But he did it so it would ‘restore’ the Lightwood name and he thought that it would keep them from arranging for me and eventually Max too. He’s bad about trying to sacrifice what he wants for others. I didn’t like it.” Izzy was still glad he hadn’t gone through with it. He had tried, too often, to sacrifice for her and others. And he hadn’t really done anything to the Lightwood name, especially in comparison to what their parents had done.

“At the time…I wasn’t sure, back home, whether or not it was true, actually.” But Izzy hadn’t been able to really say anything. After all, there had been so much going on. And maybe in her world it was different. She didn’t know, though. She wasn’t there now to find out either. “Jace is always a special case.” Izzy commented with a joking roll of her eyes, watching her brother pour coffee.

It seemed like no matter how much was different between the two worlds there were some common threads; their mother was definitely one of them. Shaking her head, Izzy couldn’t help but dislike even the alternate version of her mother. She didn’t want to focus on Maryse any more than she had, though. Focusing on her brother’s schedule, though, that she could handle. “We haven’t fought valentine yet, at least…not where I’m from.” She spoke lightly, but still couldn’t help it. “I’m just saying you have to take care of yourself and I’m more than happy to remind you if you forget because you’re not here alone anymore.” And Izzy didn’t say things that she didn’t mean. “I am glad that that got better even before me. But did you say you watch vampires flirt? And you’re training to be a first responder? I’m proud…and yet still wondering if you actually have time to do anything outside of that?” She got her response when he brought up hot guys.

Izzy laughed. That was absolutely new for her. She paused at the mention of Simon, though. "Simon's cute." Izzy started, tilting her head from her position. "But I'm not with him or anyone right now, even though I've flirted. He's wrapped up in drama with Clary and Jace...and becoming a vampire and I just broke things off with Meliorn." She explained, catching the roll of her brother's eyes. "I think you're being harsh on your Izzy. It sounds like Alecs just don't appreciate fine cooking to me." She'd been told, on more than one occasion, that her own cooking was bad. She liked most of what she made, though. Most of it.

Alec's sudden change, though, alarmed Izzy a little bit. She couldn't help but move, taking a seat as instructed. "Okay...what is it? It can't be that bad, can it?"

[angelic_archer]

“I’m sure that Maryse would date a vampire when she was your age.” He couldn’t keep the sarcasm out of his voice. Magnus had told him about his parents during their Circle days. His tone become more somber, remembering what else had been in those stories. “And you never would have killed Shadowhunters who were protecting the innocent like my mother did. Neither version of you are like Maryse.” After what Magnus had seen and the battles he’d fought in, it was amazing that he’d been open minded enough to even consider dating a Lightwood.

“Hopefully, your Alec will get out before that happens.” Realizing that meant that her brother would leave the Institute, he couldn’t quite bring himself to apologize. “One of the best things that happened to me was Magnus giving me the key to his loft. I finally had a place where I could be myself. Even if he has that, it’ll help him deal with all the changes. And if he had you and Jace to support him-” At least Alec assumed that the Jace in her reality was supporting Alec. If he’d come out at a wedding, Jace had to know his parabatai was gay. “I didn’t tell Jace for weeks so Alec has more support than I did. I will remind you that you’re a good person and how lucky your family is to have you ever day if you want me to.”

Thinking of how his Izzy had complained about her big brother, he smiled at her descriptions of her reality’s Alec. “That’s what big brothers are supposed to do. We’re going to look out for you no matter what and I’m going to look out for you since he’s not here. I can’t let an Izzy get in trouble if I’m around.” But he had failed her once. He’d failed with Max too. Shaking off the thought, he knew he’d have to confess that failing soon but dwelling on it wouldn’t help either one of them.

Alec began to say something about fate. That maybe Simon had been destined to become a vampire. Considering how important he had become during the wars, and his potential future, it might be true. But that also meant that her Max shared the same destiny as Alec’s. “I’m sure he doesn’t blame you. Our Simon never blamed her for him being turned.” He didn’t know Simon well but he would have known if Izzy had been hurting over something Simon had said or did related to the vampires.

Unsanctioned missions? Everything that they’d done during the wars were unsanctioned missions. They’d returned to be chastised and then called heroes but in hers, Alec had been forced to marry to save their reputations. A reputation that had been ruined by generations of Lghtwoods. “And being involved with the Circle didn’t tarnish our good name,” he snarked. “Lightwoods have been the black sheep of the Shadowhunters for centuries. We proved that Demon Pox existed.” Shaking his head at that version of Robert and Maryse’s ego, he began to wonder if maybe his parents weren’t quite as power hungry as he’d thought. At least they’d never considered arranged marriages as if they were living in one of those cheesy romances his Izzy read. “At least he chose someone instead of letting them barter him off.” Before she could protest his comment, he held up a hand and continued. “If they’d given me an ultimatum like that, I would have done it. It would have been a disaster when my wife realized I was gay but I would have done it.”

As he set the coffee pot back on the burner, he wondered if her Jace was special the way his was and if Valentine was manipulating him the way he’d tried with Alec’s parabatai. “I keep telling him he’s more angelic than me.” For a moment, the distance between them seemed worse. He missed Jace constantly but there were times when it was worse. A bright, painful jolt that reminded him that they were apart but that Jace was still alive. “Or I tease him about how much he angsted over Clary and then he kicks my ass the next time we spar.

“We fought Valentine a couple of times. An Angel killed him eventually, after he’d –“ Automatically, his hand went to the parabatai rune on his side. He’d lied about the bond before, both to his family and to himself, but now he was honest about it. The bond had nearly snapped that day and if Magnus hadn’t been with him, Alec would have died in the middle of the battle. “After he summon it.” Knowing that he wouldn’t be able to escape a fussing Izzy, and that he really didn’t want to, he still tried to look annoyed. “I work at Red Rum. It’s where vampires can feed without anyone getting seriously injured. So I watch them flirt with the Mundanes and make sure it never goes beyond flirting. No bespelling them. No draining them. It’s pretty boring most nights.”

The comment about his training caused him to duck his head, suddenly embarrassed by the praise. It wasn’t the type of job most Shadowhunters would accept but there weren’t demons to hunt and if he could use his runes to help others, why shouldn’t he do some good here? “I figured it kind of fit with our training.”

Crossing his arms over his chest, Alec knew he shouldn’t get defensive about how he spent his spare time. Especially when some things were confusing but it was an automatic response with Izzy. “I go to the movies and I’m planning to go to the opera. I have a friend and I talk to one of the baristas most mornings.” Maybe she wouldn’t ask too much about the friend since he wasn’t sure what he’d say about Sebastian.

His expression hardened at the mention of Meliorn. Alec knew he shouldn’t say anything, especially if she’d just broken up with him but she deserved to be warned about him. “In my world, Meliorn is a traitor,” he said carefully, his tone clipped, remembering how it’d felt to let the arrow fly. He didn’t regret it even if Jace had questioned his actions. “He didn’t survive the war.” If she didn’t ask, he wouldn’t tell her. In her world Meliorn might be innocent. What little information he’d given her could be a warning and if she ever returned to her reality, she could make her own decision.

Moving to the table, he didn’t bother sitting down and knelt beside her. “Izzy, it’s bad.” How could he tell her? He’d never had to tell anyone about it. They all just knew. They’d seen the horror themselves instead of having to give those heartbreaking words. “In my world, Valentine had two sons. One he adopted, Jace, and Clary’s brother. Jonathan. He had Jonathan pretend to be our cousin, Sebastian. We thought he was family. He secretly helped Valentine attack Alicante. During the attack, I left you and Max with him.”

Taking a deep, shuddering breath, he almost stared down at the floor, but he had to be strong for her and for Max. It was his fault and he had to accept whatever judgement and grief she felt. “I didn’t know. I was one of the only adults in the city and it was being overrun by demons. They were slaughtering children in the streets. They took one of our cousins. I had to go.” And Alec left his siblings alone with a monster in their house. “I trusted him. When I was gone he – “ Closing his eyes, he could still see his parents’ faces and the hollow way that Izzy had stared at him. Jace falling to his knees and holding their brother’s hand. “We think he meant to knock Max out but he – he didn’t survive. Izzy, I trusted him two protect both of them and he killed my baby brother.”

[withstyle]

Izzy wasn’t dating a vampire, but she understood the sentiment, anyway. And hearing Alec give her a reminder that she wasn’t like Maryse, either version of her, was a relief even if she hadn’t realized that was exactly what she needed…he wasn’t her version of her brother, but he still understood her, generally speaking. Isabelle Lightwood was not her mother, and she wanted to keep it that way; she never wanted to cross that line and be someone that she didn’t feel she was. “I wouldn’t do a lot of things that she would.” Izzy nodded, choosing to believe, for now, that he was right. She’d definitely never treat her children (should she ever even have any) the way that her mother had treated her, or apparently Alec in his home.

Izzy didn’t like the idea that her brother might need to get out before their mother could start to attack him with her degrading digs, but logically she knew that staying would be worse for Alec. It obviously had taken a toll on the version of her brother that she was with at the moment. “He’ll always have me and Jace to support him.” Izzy quickly reassured before giving a soft smile. At least her brother, back home, did have plenty of support…if nothing else. It sounded, from everything she’d put together, that this version of her brother didn’t always have all of that that he needed.

Izzy couldn’t help the way that she looked at the younger version of her older brother. He was so similar and yet different…it was almost bizarre. “I think I can get away with weekly reminders” She joked, shrugging. “And if you’re doing that then I’m your support here.” Her tone gave no room for discussion on the matter; as far as she was concerned that was what sisters did, whether he wanted it or not. “I’m really not sure that looking out for someone is just a big brother thing. It’s a sibling thing in general, and I’d definitely say back at you since your Izzy isn’t here…on the off chance you wind up in trouble.”

That was the way that she and her Alec had always managed to do things; they looked out for one another and supported one another, no matter what happened…and how dire it could be. Even if it was just emotionally. This Alec was already starting in, that was for sure. Still, Izzy shrugged off his reassurance, doing a mostly good job at not dwelling on the subject. She was always better at pretending not to be serious when compared to her brother, as well as others.

Izzy reached up to push her hair back out of her face, giving a shrug. “We’re expected to make the Lightwood name mean something, to be better, and make no mistakes. Even though we’ve never done anything to ruin the name.” Izzy frowned, though, confusion crossing her face. “At home we’re not black sheep, though, I mean…we weren’t until our parents threw their loyalty in with the Circle. We’re leaders of the New York Institute, or we were, anyway.” Izzy shrugged, not sure where things were going to go from here, considering the way that things were happening. They were expected to pay for their parents sins, and it was hard for Izzy to not rebel; unlike her brother she’d been against marriage for that sake, but she’d supported him no matter what. “He chose well. I mean…Lydia is a good person, and she wasn’t marrying him for love, but…he never would have been happy. You wouldn’t have either, so I’m just glad neither of you had to do it.” Izzy spoke earnestly. That wasn’t what she wanted for her brother, in any world.

Izzy let out an unladylike snort at her brother’s comments about Jace, shaking her head with amusement. “You, my Alec anyway, have already started in with the sisters drive you crazy comments back home. Jace isn’t amused by them.” Izzy commented lightly; she was pretty sure the comments were just as much for her as they were for Jace, honestly. Her eyes focused in on this version of her Alec, watching him, noticing the difference in his behavior, and the way he held himself when he referred to Jace. “Jeez.” Izzy breathed, not sure that that was how things would happen back home. It was hard to focus on that exactly, though. She had no idea how things would work out, ultimately.

“Interesting job choices, Alec.” Izzy lifted an eyebrow, just amused, not judging him. “They’re pretty different from one another, but it does fit with our training. Whatever you like doing, and makes you happy.” Izzy spoke, honestly. She did want her brother happy and her mouth turned into a bit of a smirk as he crossed his arms; that was a defensive position from her brother if she’d ever seen one. Still, though, she was surprised. She couldn’t help it. Even warning that things were different here didn’t prepare her for some things. “If I say I believe you and that I’m glad you don’t spend all your time working are you going to drop defensive!Alec-mode?” Izzy teased before tilting her head. “Because if you don’t and I start asking you about your friend I have a feeling I won’t get as many answers.” The formerly younger sister teased only to sober up pretty quickly.

There were differences between their worlds. Meliorn…she’d had to get him out because what was going to happen in her world was wrong. She’d done the right thing, and she couldn’t second guess that. “I don’t think he is in my world, but I guess it’s a good thing Maryse pushed me and I broke things off.” Izzy tried to remain light as she shrugged, but it was easier said than done. She was definitely concerned, overall, now.

Especially considering Alec didn’t sit, but knelt beside her. She just hoped that bad wasn’t too bad, and that her brother was overreacting like the one back home did at times. He wasn’t. Listening to her brother, Izzy chose not to interrupt, not until he was completely done with what he had to say. The series of events that he painted wasn’t pretty and it was beyond bad. The middle sibling couldn’t help but think about the baby of their family, thinking fondly about how stubborn he was being when it came to acknowledging his firebug tendencies. To think that Max could wind up…gone…that was hard to swallow. Her little brother wasn’t gone yet. And God, she hoped that he didn’t ever wind up in that situation. It didn’t escape Iz’s notice that it felt like her brother was trying to explain himself, to justify the decisions that he’d made. Her hands reached out, landing on and then squeezing both of her brother’s shoulder’s. “I’m so sorry, Alec.” Her eyes shone with emotion, just thinking about the possibility of losing her little brother. “It doesn’t sound like you had a choice.” Izzy spoke, her voice gentle, knowing that no version of Alec would put Max, or herself, in a dangerous situation knowingly. “I can’t imagine...” Izzy started only to stop, shaking off her emotion, it wasn’t her Max, she just had to remind herself that. “My Max is alive and well, but I can’t imagine anything happening to him. I can’t imagine what you went through.” She couldn’t imagine what the other version of her had went through either. She didn’t know that she wanted to know because she could already feel the dread hitting her stomach, worrying that her own baby brother was safe. She didn’t, however, blame this Alec for what had happened. It sounded as if he’d been manipulated to her. She could only imagine how much he blamed himself. “It’s not your fault, Alec. You trusted him because you didn’t know, and…god I’m so sorry that you had to go through that.” Selfishly, she hoped she’d never have to.

[angelic_archer]

“Then he’ll be okay. I didn’t think I had you both when I was trying to figure out everything with Magnus. I thought that if Jace found out, he’d –“ Alec wasn’t sure what he’d expected. He’d just been afraid. Maybe he’d thought that Jace would ignore their bond, their friendship and hate him for either the infatuation or for simply being gay. “He didn’t. He even tried to help keep us together but I couldn’t see past the panic. Your Alec’s lucky that he knows that you both are supporting him and he doesn’t have to hide.”

It was still strange seeing an older, more mature Izzy than the one he grew up with. This version of her gave him hope that maybe his sister would quit letting their parents’ lives mold her into someone who couldn’t love openly. He’d spent so much time hiding his feelings and now she was doing the same, pretending to be indifferent while her heart was breaking instead of working things out with Simon. Alec knew that love wasn’t as simple as people claimed and that it might not work out for any of them, but Izzy had to try instead of pushing everyone away. Maybe when she was older, she’d be like this version of Isabelle and be willing to give people a chance instead of keeping her distance from everyone.

By the Angel, they were all messed up when it came to relationships. Shaking his head at the thought, he gave Izzy a small smile. “I’ll make sure to schedule once a week reminders.” Would his Izzy announce that she’d be his support like this one did? She’d been supportive and had helped when his heart had been broken, but he had the feeling this Izzy would have been more open and actually tried to talk to Magnus instead of the strange ‘Lightwoods are awesome and you should date one’ attempts his sister had made. “I’ve been trying to keep myself out of trouble. Remember, Jace was the main trouble maker. Or he was in my reality.” Was he that way in Izzy’s? Maybe he’d had a normal childhood there.
“We have some of that family name responsibility back home but no one can really say anything about our methods when we won two wars for the Clave.” The comment was made simply. It wasn’t something to be proud of like some of the younger Shadowhunters thought. They’d fought. They’d won. The losses hadn’t made it worth it but at least there wasn’t a madman ruling the world. “If anyone ruined the Lightwood name it was our parents and our ancestors. They were loyal to Valentine. They did terrible things because they believed that his hatred would make the world better. And our ancestors…” His expression turned to distaste as he remembered Magnus’ story about a certain Lightwood. “One of them liked demons too much. I doubt any versions of us could tarnish the family name after all that.

“My parents run the Institute too but it was a punishment not a gift. They were exiled. None of us could go to Idris without permission until after the wars.” The Clave wasn’t going to continuing banning them after everything they’d done. “Robert and Maryse had done enough over the years to get political favor but they didn’t expect us to fix their reputations. Robert’s the Inquisitor now and Maryse is running the Institute most of the time.” Alec occasionally took on those duties but he preferred living with Magnus and helping his boyfriend with his work. Another sign that he was leaving the shadows cast by the elder Lightwoods.

Listening to Izzy’s description of Lydia, he realized how similar he was to her Alec. He would have made the same choice and could see why Lydia would have been someone that he would have accepted marrying. If Izzy thought Lydia was a good person, then she had to have something special that would have made her Alec think the marriage would work in some way. “If your brother is like me, then he never expected to be happy. It wasn’t something allowed. Neither was love.” But both versions of them had found it, even if it was complicated and messy and Alec occasionally wondered if things would ever work out.

“Wait till they find out they’re not related. Then everything will be even more awkward and weird.” But that hadn’t stopped Alec from teasing his parabatai over how Jace had pined over Clary. It’d been an effective way of keeping Jace from asking too many questions after his breakup with Magnus. “I’m not sure if I’m happy,” he admitted slowly after her comment about his jobs. “It keeps me busy and I’m one of the few people the vampires can’t whammy.” There was something, someone, who was making him almost happy, which was a subject he wasn’t sure he wanted Izzy asking about. “Izzy usually ignores anything related to my friends unless it’s about to cause serious damage.” Like the break up that Alec should have anticipated.

Meliorn wasn’t exactly a safer subject than Alec’s neighbor but at least it was one that Alec knew he could talk about easier than Sebastian. “I hope, for your sake, he isn’t a traitor. My Izzy dated him for awhile but it was casual.” Studying her thoughtfully, he noticed a few things that reminded him of how Izzy had acted whenever she’d gotten a little too close to someone. “You didn’t want to break it off?”

As he knelt beside Izzy, he tried not to think of what he could have done different. Dozens of different decisions he could have made. If he had listened to his instincts. If he hadn’t told himself that he was being his usual, distrustful self. If he hadn’t tried so hard to prove that he was finally an adult. If he’d listened to Max when he’d said that he didn’t like Sebastian/Jonathan. If he’d went back to the Penhallows’ house instead of fighting. There were so many changes that might have resulted in Max being alive. He ignored that his vision wavered, refusing to give in to the grief that he’d been holding in whenever he’d been near his sister. He’d been strong for his Izzy, refusing to let her see how much he hurt because he knew she blamed herself for Max’s death. She had been with him. She’d been unable to stop Sebastian. To her, all the guilt was hers alone but Alec knew that if he should have seen what was happening around them. “There were choices. I made the wrong ones.” Somehow his voice remained steady. “If I went back to the house instead of following the demons...”

Magnus would have died. Dozens of others would have been killed. But Max might still be alive. “I left them. I could have went back to keep them safe but I found Magnus and we were some of the only fighters left.” Alec had been so sure that Sebastian would protect them. He might not have liked his ‘cousin’, afraid that the teen saw more than he should but Sebastian was family. Why wouldn’t family look out for one another? “I thought that there was something odd about him but I told myself I was wrong. I was supposed to protect them. Mom and Dad told me to protect them. I failed and Izzy blames herself for it. I didn’t save Max and I can’t help her.”

[withstyle]

Izzy felt a good amount of sympathy for Alec, knowing that he hadn’t realized that Jace would stick by him no matter what…that his family, his real family, would. In any world, she was positive that she was not like her parents; Izzy’s loyalty was not wavering, and even if Jace made his mistakes he loved Alec no matter what difficulty his parabatai was going through. All the young shadowhunter could manage was a nod, though, thinking about how useless she’d have been without her brother’s support, and she could only offer the same for him. Izzy still had trouble imagining this alternate version of herself…the one that wasn’t quite as open with her feelings, and she still prickled at the thought. It felt, or seemed rather, too close to the way that Maryse carried herself and Izzy couldn’t stand the idea of being like that. She was glad that she wasn’t quite that person, the one that had to protect herself rather than being open. She was more harsh on that version of herself than Alec was, but that was sort of easy…considering it was still her, in some ways.

Izzy couldn’t help the laugh that escaped. “Good, I’ll hold you to it.” She teased, thoughtfully adding after a moment, “But you can make the reminders random surprises, not a particular time. It’s more interesting that way.” It was such a lame joke, but it came out anyway. She didn’t know, exactly anyway, what his actual sister was like, she just hoped that Alec could get used to her because she meant it when she said that she was going to be here and be his support. Izzy didn’t say things that she didn’t mean, and she always did her damnedest to do what she thought was right.

“Oh, Jace is always the troublemaker, but you always get dragged into it along with him. So, who knew if you’d decided to pick up the slack or not.” Izzy grinned, to show that she wasn’t criticizing the blonde that had become such an important part of their family. She added a wink on, to show that she was mostly teasing. Though, who knew what sort of trouble a more outgoing version of her brother could actually manage to find in a place like this? Izzy’d already made some interesting revelations herself. Not all of them were related to the differences between her and Alec’s worlds, though.

“My parents spend a nice chunk of time in Idris, it seems like. Max just got expelled again, actually.” Izzy offered, offhandedly, thinking about her younger brother and his impish ways. She still didn’t know why he seemed so intent on the fire rune, but that wasn’t the important thing; she knew that their parents weren’t exactly in great standing, but it seemed like her own versions had more freedom than his. “Maryse, in particular, didn’t want to lose control of the Institute, though.” Izzy wrinkled her nose; the differences were confusing and made it all the harder to figure out how similar and dissimilar their parents actually were in comparison. Izzy immediately nodded, though; she could see the similarities between the two, even if the one in front of her seemed to be more comfortable with himself. Maybe that was why it seemed so easy to attach herself to him the way she had her brother at home.

“He’s a lot like you from what I can tell, you’re just…in a better, less confused, place. Either way, though, I always wanted him, you, whatever…to be happy despite everything. Keeping the institute by marrying…definitely wasn’t an idea I liked, but I support my brothers even when they’re being stupid. Or stupidly noble.” Izzy shared, pointedly. It was true, though; she’d supported them throughout whatever….even if it was a mistake, she just…always did. Izzy couldn’t help but lift an eyebrow; she didn’t know if it was possible for the Clary and Jace situation to get more awkward, but she hoped it didn’t.

She already didn’t know what to do with the entire situation. “One, I hope that’s what they find out if I ever get back home. Two, I didn’t know that situation could get more awkward and weird when it was happening.” Izzy admitted with a little bit of a sigh before shaking that off. Izzy was meddlesome, but she’d been a little caught up with other things throughout all of that. And a part of her knew that that hadn’t helped Jace, or Clary, at the time, but she couldn’t go back and fix it.

She could help fix things for Alec here and now, though. “Well, you should find what makes you happy and what you enjoy doing.” Izzy’s tone was definitely bordering on bossy, but she didn’t feel as if it was much of a mistake in this case. Alec didn’t need to keep busy to stop thinking about his family now; she might not be his Izzy, but he had her now. And she would always be encouraging; she couldn’t help it. “You don’t need to keeps yourself busy all the time…and just because the vampires can’t get to you doesn’t mean that it’s your responsibility, you know, I’m sure there are others if you want to do other things.” She couldn’t help herself. Izzy had skills that she enjoyed, and she wanted the same for her brother…at home he’d been the one to take charge at the Institute the vast majority of the time, but that wasn’t by choice; it was birthright. The unladylike snort escaped Izzy’s mouth, and she didn’t bother to pretend that she hadn’t let it out. “Well, you’re going to get used to me not ignoring those things sooner or later, I’m sure.” A grin pulled at her painted lips and she followed it up with a shrug. “I like to be involved.”

The unfortunate thing was that she didn’t always want to drag Alec into her own issues and problems. She hoped, silently, that Meliorn wasn’t a traitor too, otherwise the rescue operation she’d championed…was for someone who didn’t deserve it. No, that wasn’t true. What they were going to do to him still wasn’t right, especially for the reason that he’d been brought in. Izzy couldn’t doubt that, her sense of justice in this matter, right now. She was surprised, though, by Alec’s question and shrugged it off, unsuccessfully. “I…broke it off because Maryse.” She admitted, frowning. “I was going through a phase, an attempting to grow up and not be the rebellious sibling phase.” Izzy shrugged again, not sure that quite explained it. “I actually thought doing that and dressing and acting the way she wanted would take some of the pressure off of Alec and that I’d prove myself to her. It was stupid, but it wasn’t the wrong thing to do.” It just hadn’t really been her choice. It wasn’t important, though, or at least that’s what Izzy tried to tell herself. Especially in comparison to some of the other subjects, especially the ones Alec needed to touch on.

“You wouldn’t do that, Alec.” Izzy corrected her brother, gently. She knew Alec. She even felt like she knew this Alec. He had too much of a sense of responsibility. He’d done what he thought was right in the moment. “You did what was right in the moment. You couldn’t let other people suffer.” She was convinced she was right and there wasn’t going to be any changing her mind. Squeezing her brother’s shoulders, the very ones that she knew had carried far more weight than should have been heaped on, Izzy felt sad. She could tell that what happened had a huge effect on him, and she was sure it had a big one on every single member of their family.

Izzy moved, leaning in and wrapping her arms around her brother, understanding, and yet knowing that despite his emotional state…there was nothing that he could have done. She could feel a lump in her stomach, even one in her throat, as she thought about the possibility of that happening to her brothers, to the family she left behind. It didn’t change her opinion. “You didn’t know, you were in a hard position and you made the choice that you had to. The right choice. You didn’t know that he was going to betray you.” She soothed, trying not to think about what she’d do, what she’d think, and what she’d feel if she were in his Izzy’s shoes at the time. What would she feel if she hadn’t been able to save Max?

She’d blame herself. She knew it. She couldn’t deny that, but Alec hadn’t done anything wrong. It wasn’t his fault. “It doesn’t make anything better, or change it, but you didn’t do anything wrong. And it’s not your fault, or her’s….no matter how much you both blame yourselves. I wasn’t there, I haven’t been through it, but…from what you’ve said it’s not either of your faults.” It wasn’t easy to say, but…it was a little easier considering it wasn’t her situation, she hadn’t been through it. But she still dreaded the idea that it could happen, potentially. She couldn’t help the frown marring her face, or the emotion that was held just beneath the surface; it wasn’t her family, her Max, but she felt the emotions all the same. Especially considering the fact that she couldn’t rule out the possibility that it could one day happen to her little brother. God, she really hoped that it didn’t; she didn’t care how selfish it was, but she didn’t hope that just for her, but for the adorable imp everyone loved back home.

It felt wrong to be emotional at someone else’s pain and torment…that she hadn’t had to face, and yet here she was holding back her own emotions, and doing her best to be strong for the brother that had been through so much more than the one that she knew. It was definitely easier said than done. It only made things more apparent that they needed one another, even if they weren’t quite the right versions for the other.