tdm

[medietas_mods]

Welcome to Medietas! Have an interest in joining the game? Maybe you have an old muse that you want to dust off? Or, maybe you're just looking for a place to voice test a brand new character and would like to do so in our little island setting among friends? Well, whatever the reason, this is where you can do that!

You all know what to do but if you don’t, just follow the instructions and HAVE FUN!

How To Play:

→ Comment with the character you’d like to test drive. Don’t forget to add their name and canon in the subject line.
→ Choose a scenario, or start your own!
→ Tag around!

Possible Scenarios:

1. New Arrival: You've just arrived on the island of Medietas, in the city of Aerilon, via a floating boat with people you may or may not know. Of course, you can't help wondering what the heck is going on, or how you even got on the boat in the first place. But as soon as the vessel docks you are greeted by some lovely locals who offer you a map and a communications device before leaving you to your own. You probably have questions and there seems to be a number of people there already who may or may not have those answers. Talk to them! Or, get on the network and introduce yourself!

2. Getting Settled: So, now that you've arrived and wandered around the starter home you've been given, it's time to check out the rest of the islands. There's a market on Aerilon that is full of treasures. Or, you can check out Chapter Six bookstore. Perhaps you wander over to the Mean Princess facility on Mulciber. There is so much to see!

3. Event: Teams are being put together to venture out deep into the islands of Eurus and Mulciber to track and destroy a vicious beast who has been the reason for the disappearances of several island locals. Please help stop the creature before anyone else goes missing!

4. Wild Card: Got something else in mind and want to create your own scenario? Go for it!

Comments

[angelic_archer]

“I’m sure that Maryse would date a vampire when she was your age.” He couldn’t keep the sarcasm out of his voice. Magnus had told him about his parents during their Circle days. His tone become more somber, remembering what else had been in those stories. “And you never would have killed Shadowhunters who were protecting the innocent like my mother did. Neither version of you are like Maryse.” After what Magnus had seen and the battles he’d fought in, it was amazing that he’d been open minded enough to even consider dating a Lightwood.

“Hopefully, your Alec will get out before that happens.” Realizing that meant that her brother would leave the Institute, he couldn’t quite bring himself to apologize. “One of the best things that happened to me was Magnus giving me the key to his loft. I finally had a place where I could be myself. Even if he has that, it’ll help him deal with all the changes. And if he had you and Jace to support him-” At least Alec assumed that the Jace in her reality was supporting Alec. If he’d come out at a wedding, Jace had to know his parabatai was gay. “I didn’t tell Jace for weeks so Alec has more support than I did. I will remind you that you’re a good person and how lucky your family is to have you ever day if you want me to.”

Thinking of how his Izzy had complained about her big brother, he smiled at her descriptions of her reality’s Alec. “That’s what big brothers are supposed to do. We’re going to look out for you no matter what and I’m going to look out for you since he’s not here. I can’t let an Izzy get in trouble if I’m around.” But he had failed her once. He’d failed with Max too. Shaking off the thought, he knew he’d have to confess that failing soon but dwelling on it wouldn’t help either one of them.

Alec began to say something about fate. That maybe Simon had been destined to become a vampire. Considering how important he had become during the wars, and his potential future, it might be true. But that also meant that her Max shared the same destiny as Alec’s. “I’m sure he doesn’t blame you. Our Simon never blamed her for him being turned.” He didn’t know Simon well but he would have known if Izzy had been hurting over something Simon had said or did related to the vampires.

Unsanctioned missions? Everything that they’d done during the wars were unsanctioned missions. They’d returned to be chastised and then called heroes but in hers, Alec had been forced to marry to save their reputations. A reputation that had been ruined by generations of Lghtwoods. “And being involved with the Circle didn’t tarnish our good name,” he snarked. “Lightwoods have been the black sheep of the Shadowhunters for centuries. We proved that Demon Pox existed.” Shaking his head at that version of Robert and Maryse’s ego, he began to wonder if maybe his parents weren’t quite as power hungry as he’d thought. At least they’d never considered arranged marriages as if they were living in one of those cheesy romances his Izzy read. “At least he chose someone instead of letting them barter him off.” Before she could protest his comment, he held up a hand and continued. “If they’d given me an ultimatum like that, I would have done it. It would have been a disaster when my wife realized I was gay but I would have done it.”

As he set the coffee pot back on the burner, he wondered if her Jace was special the way his was and if Valentine was manipulating him the way he’d tried with Alec’s parabatai. “I keep telling him he’s more angelic than me.” For a moment, the distance between them seemed worse. He missed Jace constantly but there were times when it was worse. A bright, painful jolt that reminded him that they were apart but that Jace was still alive. “Or I tease him about how much he angsted over Clary and then he kicks my ass the next time we spar.

“We fought Valentine a couple of times. An Angel killed him eventually, after he’d –“ Automatically, his hand went to the parabatai rune on his side. He’d lied about the bond before, both to his family and to himself, but now he was honest about it. The bond had nearly snapped that day and if Magnus hadn’t been with him, Alec would have died in the middle of the battle. “After he summon it.” Knowing that he wouldn’t be able to escape a fussing Izzy, and that he really didn’t want to, he still tried to look annoyed. “I work at Red Rum. It’s where vampires can feed without anyone getting seriously injured. So I watch them flirt with the Mundanes and make sure it never goes beyond flirting. No bespelling them. No draining them. It’s pretty boring most nights.”

The comment about his training caused him to duck his head, suddenly embarrassed by the praise. It wasn’t the type of job most Shadowhunters would accept but there weren’t demons to hunt and if he could use his runes to help others, why shouldn’t he do some good here? “I figured it kind of fit with our training.”

Crossing his arms over his chest, Alec knew he shouldn’t get defensive about how he spent his spare time. Especially when some things were confusing but it was an automatic response with Izzy. “I go to the movies and I’m planning to go to the opera. I have a friend and I talk to one of the baristas most mornings.” Maybe she wouldn’t ask too much about the friend since he wasn’t sure what he’d say about Sebastian.

His expression hardened at the mention of Meliorn. Alec knew he shouldn’t say anything, especially if she’d just broken up with him but she deserved to be warned about him. “In my world, Meliorn is a traitor,” he said carefully, his tone clipped, remembering how it’d felt to let the arrow fly. He didn’t regret it even if Jace had questioned his actions. “He didn’t survive the war.” If she didn’t ask, he wouldn’t tell her. In her world Meliorn might be innocent. What little information he’d given her could be a warning and if she ever returned to her reality, she could make her own decision.

Moving to the table, he didn’t bother sitting down and knelt beside her. “Izzy, it’s bad.” How could he tell her? He’d never had to tell anyone about it. They all just knew. They’d seen the horror themselves instead of having to give those heartbreaking words. “In my world, Valentine had two sons. One he adopted, Jace, and Clary’s brother. Jonathan. He had Jonathan pretend to be our cousin, Sebastian. We thought he was family. He secretly helped Valentine attack Alicante. During the attack, I left you and Max with him.”

Taking a deep, shuddering breath, he almost stared down at the floor, but he had to be strong for her and for Max. It was his fault and he had to accept whatever judgement and grief she felt. “I didn’t know. I was one of the only adults in the city and it was being overrun by demons. They were slaughtering children in the streets. They took one of our cousins. I had to go.” And Alec left his siblings alone with a monster in their house. “I trusted him. When I was gone he – “ Closing his eyes, he could still see his parents’ faces and the hollow way that Izzy had stared at him. Jace falling to his knees and holding their brother’s hand. “We think he meant to knock Max out but he – he didn’t survive. Izzy, I trusted him two protect both of them and he killed my baby brother.”

[withstyle]

Izzy wasn’t dating a vampire, but she understood the sentiment, anyway. And hearing Alec give her a reminder that she wasn’t like Maryse, either version of her, was a relief even if she hadn’t realized that was exactly what she needed…he wasn’t her version of her brother, but he still understood her, generally speaking. Isabelle Lightwood was not her mother, and she wanted to keep it that way; she never wanted to cross that line and be someone that she didn’t feel she was. “I wouldn’t do a lot of things that she would.” Izzy nodded, choosing to believe, for now, that he was right. She’d definitely never treat her children (should she ever even have any) the way that her mother had treated her, or apparently Alec in his home.

Izzy didn’t like the idea that her brother might need to get out before their mother could start to attack him with her degrading digs, but logically she knew that staying would be worse for Alec. It obviously had taken a toll on the version of her brother that she was with at the moment. “He’ll always have me and Jace to support him.” Izzy quickly reassured before giving a soft smile. At least her brother, back home, did have plenty of support…if nothing else. It sounded, from everything she’d put together, that this version of her brother didn’t always have all of that that he needed.

Izzy couldn’t help the way that she looked at the younger version of her older brother. He was so similar and yet different…it was almost bizarre. “I think I can get away with weekly reminders” She joked, shrugging. “And if you’re doing that then I’m your support here.” Her tone gave no room for discussion on the matter; as far as she was concerned that was what sisters did, whether he wanted it or not. “I’m really not sure that looking out for someone is just a big brother thing. It’s a sibling thing in general, and I’d definitely say back at you since your Izzy isn’t here…on the off chance you wind up in trouble.”

That was the way that she and her Alec had always managed to do things; they looked out for one another and supported one another, no matter what happened…and how dire it could be. Even if it was just emotionally. This Alec was already starting in, that was for sure. Still, Izzy shrugged off his reassurance, doing a mostly good job at not dwelling on the subject. She was always better at pretending not to be serious when compared to her brother, as well as others.

Izzy reached up to push her hair back out of her face, giving a shrug. “We’re expected to make the Lightwood name mean something, to be better, and make no mistakes. Even though we’ve never done anything to ruin the name.” Izzy frowned, though, confusion crossing her face. “At home we’re not black sheep, though, I mean…we weren’t until our parents threw their loyalty in with the Circle. We’re leaders of the New York Institute, or we were, anyway.” Izzy shrugged, not sure where things were going to go from here, considering the way that things were happening. They were expected to pay for their parents sins, and it was hard for Izzy to not rebel; unlike her brother she’d been against marriage for that sake, but she’d supported him no matter what. “He chose well. I mean…Lydia is a good person, and she wasn’t marrying him for love, but…he never would have been happy. You wouldn’t have either, so I’m just glad neither of you had to do it.” Izzy spoke earnestly. That wasn’t what she wanted for her brother, in any world.

Izzy let out an unladylike snort at her brother’s comments about Jace, shaking her head with amusement. “You, my Alec anyway, have already started in with the sisters drive you crazy comments back home. Jace isn’t amused by them.” Izzy commented lightly; she was pretty sure the comments were just as much for her as they were for Jace, honestly. Her eyes focused in on this version of her Alec, watching him, noticing the difference in his behavior, and the way he held himself when he referred to Jace. “Jeez.” Izzy breathed, not sure that that was how things would happen back home. It was hard to focus on that exactly, though. She had no idea how things would work out, ultimately.

“Interesting job choices, Alec.” Izzy lifted an eyebrow, just amused, not judging him. “They’re pretty different from one another, but it does fit with our training. Whatever you like doing, and makes you happy.” Izzy spoke, honestly. She did want her brother happy and her mouth turned into a bit of a smirk as he crossed his arms; that was a defensive position from her brother if she’d ever seen one. Still, though, she was surprised. She couldn’t help it. Even warning that things were different here didn’t prepare her for some things. “If I say I believe you and that I’m glad you don’t spend all your time working are you going to drop defensive!Alec-mode?” Izzy teased before tilting her head. “Because if you don’t and I start asking you about your friend I have a feeling I won’t get as many answers.” The formerly younger sister teased only to sober up pretty quickly.

There were differences between their worlds. Meliorn…she’d had to get him out because what was going to happen in her world was wrong. She’d done the right thing, and she couldn’t second guess that. “I don’t think he is in my world, but I guess it’s a good thing Maryse pushed me and I broke things off.” Izzy tried to remain light as she shrugged, but it was easier said than done. She was definitely concerned, overall, now.

Especially considering Alec didn’t sit, but knelt beside her. She just hoped that bad wasn’t too bad, and that her brother was overreacting like the one back home did at times. He wasn’t. Listening to her brother, Izzy chose not to interrupt, not until he was completely done with what he had to say. The series of events that he painted wasn’t pretty and it was beyond bad. The middle sibling couldn’t help but think about the baby of their family, thinking fondly about how stubborn he was being when it came to acknowledging his firebug tendencies. To think that Max could wind up…gone…that was hard to swallow. Her little brother wasn’t gone yet. And God, she hoped that he didn’t ever wind up in that situation. It didn’t escape Iz’s notice that it felt like her brother was trying to explain himself, to justify the decisions that he’d made. Her hands reached out, landing on and then squeezing both of her brother’s shoulder’s. “I’m so sorry, Alec.” Her eyes shone with emotion, just thinking about the possibility of losing her little brother. “It doesn’t sound like you had a choice.” Izzy spoke, her voice gentle, knowing that no version of Alec would put Max, or herself, in a dangerous situation knowingly. “I can’t imagine...” Izzy started only to stop, shaking off her emotion, it wasn’t her Max, she just had to remind herself that. “My Max is alive and well, but I can’t imagine anything happening to him. I can’t imagine what you went through.” She couldn’t imagine what the other version of her had went through either. She didn’t know that she wanted to know because she could already feel the dread hitting her stomach, worrying that her own baby brother was safe. She didn’t, however, blame this Alec for what had happened. It sounded as if he’d been manipulated to her. She could only imagine how much he blamed himself. “It’s not your fault, Alec. You trusted him because you didn’t know, and…god I’m so sorry that you had to go through that.” Selfishly, she hoped she’d never have to.

[angelic_archer]

“Then he’ll be okay. I didn’t think I had you both when I was trying to figure out everything with Magnus. I thought that if Jace found out, he’d –“ Alec wasn’t sure what he’d expected. He’d just been afraid. Maybe he’d thought that Jace would ignore their bond, their friendship and hate him for either the infatuation or for simply being gay. “He didn’t. He even tried to help keep us together but I couldn’t see past the panic. Your Alec’s lucky that he knows that you both are supporting him and he doesn’t have to hide.”

It was still strange seeing an older, more mature Izzy than the one he grew up with. This version of her gave him hope that maybe his sister would quit letting their parents’ lives mold her into someone who couldn’t love openly. He’d spent so much time hiding his feelings and now she was doing the same, pretending to be indifferent while her heart was breaking instead of working things out with Simon. Alec knew that love wasn’t as simple as people claimed and that it might not work out for any of them, but Izzy had to try instead of pushing everyone away. Maybe when she was older, she’d be like this version of Isabelle and be willing to give people a chance instead of keeping her distance from everyone.

By the Angel, they were all messed up when it came to relationships. Shaking his head at the thought, he gave Izzy a small smile. “I’ll make sure to schedule once a week reminders.” Would his Izzy announce that she’d be his support like this one did? She’d been supportive and had helped when his heart had been broken, but he had the feeling this Izzy would have been more open and actually tried to talk to Magnus instead of the strange ‘Lightwoods are awesome and you should date one’ attempts his sister had made. “I’ve been trying to keep myself out of trouble. Remember, Jace was the main trouble maker. Or he was in my reality.” Was he that way in Izzy’s? Maybe he’d had a normal childhood there.
“We have some of that family name responsibility back home but no one can really say anything about our methods when we won two wars for the Clave.” The comment was made simply. It wasn’t something to be proud of like some of the younger Shadowhunters thought. They’d fought. They’d won. The losses hadn’t made it worth it but at least there wasn’t a madman ruling the world. “If anyone ruined the Lightwood name it was our parents and our ancestors. They were loyal to Valentine. They did terrible things because they believed that his hatred would make the world better. And our ancestors…” His expression turned to distaste as he remembered Magnus’ story about a certain Lightwood. “One of them liked demons too much. I doubt any versions of us could tarnish the family name after all that.

“My parents run the Institute too but it was a punishment not a gift. They were exiled. None of us could go to Idris without permission until after the wars.” The Clave wasn’t going to continuing banning them after everything they’d done. “Robert and Maryse had done enough over the years to get political favor but they didn’t expect us to fix their reputations. Robert’s the Inquisitor now and Maryse is running the Institute most of the time.” Alec occasionally took on those duties but he preferred living with Magnus and helping his boyfriend with his work. Another sign that he was leaving the shadows cast by the elder Lightwoods.

Listening to Izzy’s description of Lydia, he realized how similar he was to her Alec. He would have made the same choice and could see why Lydia would have been someone that he would have accepted marrying. If Izzy thought Lydia was a good person, then she had to have something special that would have made her Alec think the marriage would work in some way. “If your brother is like me, then he never expected to be happy. It wasn’t something allowed. Neither was love.” But both versions of them had found it, even if it was complicated and messy and Alec occasionally wondered if things would ever work out.

“Wait till they find out they’re not related. Then everything will be even more awkward and weird.” But that hadn’t stopped Alec from teasing his parabatai over how Jace had pined over Clary. It’d been an effective way of keeping Jace from asking too many questions after his breakup with Magnus. “I’m not sure if I’m happy,” he admitted slowly after her comment about his jobs. “It keeps me busy and I’m one of the few people the vampires can’t whammy.” There was something, someone, who was making him almost happy, which was a subject he wasn’t sure he wanted Izzy asking about. “Izzy usually ignores anything related to my friends unless it’s about to cause serious damage.” Like the break up that Alec should have anticipated.

Meliorn wasn’t exactly a safer subject than Alec’s neighbor but at least it was one that Alec knew he could talk about easier than Sebastian. “I hope, for your sake, he isn’t a traitor. My Izzy dated him for awhile but it was casual.” Studying her thoughtfully, he noticed a few things that reminded him of how Izzy had acted whenever she’d gotten a little too close to someone. “You didn’t want to break it off?”

As he knelt beside Izzy, he tried not to think of what he could have done different. Dozens of different decisions he could have made. If he had listened to his instincts. If he hadn’t told himself that he was being his usual, distrustful self. If he hadn’t tried so hard to prove that he was finally an adult. If he’d listened to Max when he’d said that he didn’t like Sebastian/Jonathan. If he’d went back to the Penhallows’ house instead of fighting. There were so many changes that might have resulted in Max being alive. He ignored that his vision wavered, refusing to give in to the grief that he’d been holding in whenever he’d been near his sister. He’d been strong for his Izzy, refusing to let her see how much he hurt because he knew she blamed herself for Max’s death. She had been with him. She’d been unable to stop Sebastian. To her, all the guilt was hers alone but Alec knew that if he should have seen what was happening around them. “There were choices. I made the wrong ones.” Somehow his voice remained steady. “If I went back to the house instead of following the demons...”

Magnus would have died. Dozens of others would have been killed. But Max might still be alive. “I left them. I could have went back to keep them safe but I found Magnus and we were some of the only fighters left.” Alec had been so sure that Sebastian would protect them. He might not have liked his ‘cousin’, afraid that the teen saw more than he should but Sebastian was family. Why wouldn’t family look out for one another? “I thought that there was something odd about him but I told myself I was wrong. I was supposed to protect them. Mom and Dad told me to protect them. I failed and Izzy blames herself for it. I didn’t save Max and I can’t help her.”

[withstyle]

Izzy felt a good amount of sympathy for Alec, knowing that he hadn’t realized that Jace would stick by him no matter what…that his family, his real family, would. In any world, she was positive that she was not like her parents; Izzy’s loyalty was not wavering, and even if Jace made his mistakes he loved Alec no matter what difficulty his parabatai was going through. All the young shadowhunter could manage was a nod, though, thinking about how useless she’d have been without her brother’s support, and she could only offer the same for him. Izzy still had trouble imagining this alternate version of herself…the one that wasn’t quite as open with her feelings, and she still prickled at the thought. It felt, or seemed rather, too close to the way that Maryse carried herself and Izzy couldn’t stand the idea of being like that. She was glad that she wasn’t quite that person, the one that had to protect herself rather than being open. She was more harsh on that version of herself than Alec was, but that was sort of easy…considering it was still her, in some ways.

Izzy couldn’t help the laugh that escaped. “Good, I’ll hold you to it.” She teased, thoughtfully adding after a moment, “But you can make the reminders random surprises, not a particular time. It’s more interesting that way.” It was such a lame joke, but it came out anyway. She didn’t know, exactly anyway, what his actual sister was like, she just hoped that Alec could get used to her because she meant it when she said that she was going to be here and be his support. Izzy didn’t say things that she didn’t mean, and she always did her damnedest to do what she thought was right.

“Oh, Jace is always the troublemaker, but you always get dragged into it along with him. So, who knew if you’d decided to pick up the slack or not.” Izzy grinned, to show that she wasn’t criticizing the blonde that had become such an important part of their family. She added a wink on, to show that she was mostly teasing. Though, who knew what sort of trouble a more outgoing version of her brother could actually manage to find in a place like this? Izzy’d already made some interesting revelations herself. Not all of them were related to the differences between her and Alec’s worlds, though.

“My parents spend a nice chunk of time in Idris, it seems like. Max just got expelled again, actually.” Izzy offered, offhandedly, thinking about her younger brother and his impish ways. She still didn’t know why he seemed so intent on the fire rune, but that wasn’t the important thing; she knew that their parents weren’t exactly in great standing, but it seemed like her own versions had more freedom than his. “Maryse, in particular, didn’t want to lose control of the Institute, though.” Izzy wrinkled her nose; the differences were confusing and made it all the harder to figure out how similar and dissimilar their parents actually were in comparison. Izzy immediately nodded, though; she could see the similarities between the two, even if the one in front of her seemed to be more comfortable with himself. Maybe that was why it seemed so easy to attach herself to him the way she had her brother at home.

“He’s a lot like you from what I can tell, you’re just…in a better, less confused, place. Either way, though, I always wanted him, you, whatever…to be happy despite everything. Keeping the institute by marrying…definitely wasn’t an idea I liked, but I support my brothers even when they’re being stupid. Or stupidly noble.” Izzy shared, pointedly. It was true, though; she’d supported them throughout whatever….even if it was a mistake, she just…always did. Izzy couldn’t help but lift an eyebrow; she didn’t know if it was possible for the Clary and Jace situation to get more awkward, but she hoped it didn’t.

She already didn’t know what to do with the entire situation. “One, I hope that’s what they find out if I ever get back home. Two, I didn’t know that situation could get more awkward and weird when it was happening.” Izzy admitted with a little bit of a sigh before shaking that off. Izzy was meddlesome, but she’d been a little caught up with other things throughout all of that. And a part of her knew that that hadn’t helped Jace, or Clary, at the time, but she couldn’t go back and fix it.

She could help fix things for Alec here and now, though. “Well, you should find what makes you happy and what you enjoy doing.” Izzy’s tone was definitely bordering on bossy, but she didn’t feel as if it was much of a mistake in this case. Alec didn’t need to keep busy to stop thinking about his family now; she might not be his Izzy, but he had her now. And she would always be encouraging; she couldn’t help it. “You don’t need to keeps yourself busy all the time…and just because the vampires can’t get to you doesn’t mean that it’s your responsibility, you know, I’m sure there are others if you want to do other things.” She couldn’t help herself. Izzy had skills that she enjoyed, and she wanted the same for her brother…at home he’d been the one to take charge at the Institute the vast majority of the time, but that wasn’t by choice; it was birthright. The unladylike snort escaped Izzy’s mouth, and she didn’t bother to pretend that she hadn’t let it out. “Well, you’re going to get used to me not ignoring those things sooner or later, I’m sure.” A grin pulled at her painted lips and she followed it up with a shrug. “I like to be involved.”

The unfortunate thing was that she didn’t always want to drag Alec into her own issues and problems. She hoped, silently, that Meliorn wasn’t a traitor too, otherwise the rescue operation she’d championed…was for someone who didn’t deserve it. No, that wasn’t true. What they were going to do to him still wasn’t right, especially for the reason that he’d been brought in. Izzy couldn’t doubt that, her sense of justice in this matter, right now. She was surprised, though, by Alec’s question and shrugged it off, unsuccessfully. “I…broke it off because Maryse.” She admitted, frowning. “I was going through a phase, an attempting to grow up and not be the rebellious sibling phase.” Izzy shrugged again, not sure that quite explained it. “I actually thought doing that and dressing and acting the way she wanted would take some of the pressure off of Alec and that I’d prove myself to her. It was stupid, but it wasn’t the wrong thing to do.” It just hadn’t really been her choice. It wasn’t important, though, or at least that’s what Izzy tried to tell herself. Especially in comparison to some of the other subjects, especially the ones Alec needed to touch on.

“You wouldn’t do that, Alec.” Izzy corrected her brother, gently. She knew Alec. She even felt like she knew this Alec. He had too much of a sense of responsibility. He’d done what he thought was right in the moment. “You did what was right in the moment. You couldn’t let other people suffer.” She was convinced she was right and there wasn’t going to be any changing her mind. Squeezing her brother’s shoulders, the very ones that she knew had carried far more weight than should have been heaped on, Izzy felt sad. She could tell that what happened had a huge effect on him, and she was sure it had a big one on every single member of their family.

Izzy moved, leaning in and wrapping her arms around her brother, understanding, and yet knowing that despite his emotional state…there was nothing that he could have done. She could feel a lump in her stomach, even one in her throat, as she thought about the possibility of that happening to her brothers, to the family she left behind. It didn’t change her opinion. “You didn’t know, you were in a hard position and you made the choice that you had to. The right choice. You didn’t know that he was going to betray you.” She soothed, trying not to think about what she’d do, what she’d think, and what she’d feel if she were in his Izzy’s shoes at the time. What would she feel if she hadn’t been able to save Max?

She’d blame herself. She knew it. She couldn’t deny that, but Alec hadn’t done anything wrong. It wasn’t his fault. “It doesn’t make anything better, or change it, but you didn’t do anything wrong. And it’s not your fault, or her’s….no matter how much you both blame yourselves. I wasn’t there, I haven’t been through it, but…from what you’ve said it’s not either of your faults.” It wasn’t easy to say, but…it was a little easier considering it wasn’t her situation, she hadn’t been through it. But she still dreaded the idea that it could happen, potentially. She couldn’t help the frown marring her face, or the emotion that was held just beneath the surface; it wasn’t her family, her Max, but she felt the emotions all the same. Especially considering the fact that she couldn’t rule out the possibility that it could one day happen to her little brother. God, she really hoped that it didn’t; she didn’t care how selfish it was, but she didn’t hope that just for her, but for the adorable imp everyone loved back home.

It felt wrong to be emotional at someone else’s pain and torment…that she hadn’t had to face, and yet here she was holding back her own emotions, and doing her best to be strong for the brother that had been through so much more than the one that she knew. It was definitely easier said than done. It only made things more apparent that they needed one another, even if they weren’t quite the right versions for the other.